I'm a bit down tonight. I feel so lame complaining online.. but it makes me feel better to just type and get it out. At least make me feel better until I stop being cheap and buy myself a new journal.
I'm getting really worried about my trip to Georgia to see Nathan next month. I need to lose 17lbs by August 23rd. I hate feeling so big. I hate feeling so ugly when I am around him. Like he is humouring me when he says I look good. He treats me wonderfully... and I think he deserves better then seeing me being all fat ass looking when I go to see him after 5 months.
And then I'm stupid and nibble on a bit of low carb cornbread tonight. And I think I fucked it up again. I wanted to stay under 15 carbs today. And I'm sitting here actually thinking about taking Stacker 3's again.
I should just sleep on it. Go to work tomorrow.. then hit the gym.. and then stop being well.. a tubby ass.
I am not looking to be TINY. I know I can never be that.
I just want to be good in my own skin. be as good as MY body can be.
I'm getting really worried about my trip to Georgia to see Nathan next month. I need to lose 17lbs by August 23rd. I hate feeling so big. I hate feeling so ugly when I am around him. Like he is humouring me when he says I look good. He treats me wonderfully... and I think he deserves better then seeing me being all fat ass looking when I go to see him after 5 months.
And then I'm stupid and nibble on a bit of low carb cornbread tonight. And I think I fucked it up again. I wanted to stay under 15 carbs today. And I'm sitting here actually thinking about taking Stacker 3's again.
I should just sleep on it. Go to work tomorrow.. then hit the gym.. and then stop being well.. a tubby ass.
I am not looking to be TINY. I know I can never be that.
I just want to be good in my own skin. be as good as MY body can be.
a) he's giving you a compliment
and
b) he will almost always mean it
so believe the man. and as far as i know, guys don't mind a girl with a couple extra lbs - so don't get too worked up over the extra few. you look better than you think.