monksta

peering through a 2nd floor window
i'm looking at brick laid upon brick
and this city seems larger than
the one i left, the people i left.

i'm surrounded by friends that
reminisce about past times and goodbyes
and i'm smiling in this
half-held together body.

clothes folded over clothes, and
words caressing the ears like
notes layering the top of martinis,
we are all...
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i stroll outside and look upon the great divide,
grass and then 2 parts gravel, 1 part sand,
with water as the binding agent, then back
to grass.

those wheels roar down the street making
as much noise as a cinco de mayo party and
i'm watching the end of a cigarette light up
and shine a spotlight on my eyes.

"no officer, i haven't...
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i am strolling through city streets in my head,
running past fire hydrants and dogs that bark,
cars whirling, whipping by with horns and noise,
and noise, and streetlights that are off

i hear those whistles and cat calls, and wonder
is it always like the Olympics for women?

They never win a silver or gold though, just
a couple choice words and dirty sneers,...
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she is a moving wall,
that i can't hold onto.

i want a couch for two
and tea for you
and i fall.

she dances; i've seen photos.
she'll never agree
her eyes are pure
i've seen them toss and turn
like my nights.

We stare at those silver haired hippies waving their eyes back and forth,
walking hand in hand on these trails washed with water,
and we stop so you can tie knots into shoes
and i notice for the first time, how much i've fallen into
a lake of perfect blue water and i'm not scared of drowning

there are these cracks in concrete three stories...
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two lovers on a rooftop,
one staring at the moon,
feeling remorse, feeling swept away
with paintbrushes and soft touches
she moves,
another crying in her arms,
his head buried deep down,
full of romance, full of life
that seems to be
breaking down,

this house is a burning keg,
a powder trail on fire,
and one man in an empty bed
is deciding its...
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i am not some snob that pulls apart the strings that tie you together,
basing my entire life on some collection of dusty records that no one
has heard about, felt, been through

i am a mini-series, a very badly cancelled one,
that get's rehashed and brought back on some other network.

i am a pop song, sung at the right time, for the right...
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a broken beer bottle is the only thing keeping my head from spinning,

revisiting, reminicising, you see those girls with their little underwear dancing on pillows, on pillows,

and they sing.

i forgot what it feels like to be young,
and it's hard to remember that ho-hum, ho-hum feeling, jumping, running, standing,

we took in those sights like a baseball leaving the park, just catching...
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I was five and he was six,
we rode on horses made of sticks.
He wore black and I wore white,
he would always win the fight.

Bang Bang,
He shot me down
Bang Bang,
I hit the ground
Bang Bang,
That awfull sound
Bang Bang,
My baby shot me down.

-----

Going to Arkansas this weekend. Smiles.

it's funny, revisiting thoughts and ideas and old people.

finding out that a girl you fell for left the boy she fell
for and how she's happy she's alone.

finding out old people you thought you'd never talk to again
magically appear and wipe that hate right off your face.

it's just odd, these days.

i'm glad i'm above it all, which is snobbish to...
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went to the hospital.
they tested me.
i was passed out.
i was knocked out.

they found nothing wrong.
no cancer.
no disease.

now i'm just a ball of drugs
flickering in and out of the day
but whatever is wrong with
me is not serious

sarious that is.

thanks for anyone who cared.

"surprise sometime
I'll come around
surprise sometime
I'll come around
I will surprise you sometime
I'll come around
I will surprise you sometime
I'll come around
when you're down"

taken in stride,
taken in time,
i will find myself following that logic
surprise followed by coming around
when you're (or is it I) am down

smiles tend to creep out of shadows
and they don't...
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