Crystal Clear
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So I was walking home from the movies, and I see this couple running down the sidewalk towards me, playing catch me if you can At a distance, I think maybe they are in love, the girl is laughing and doesnt seem to be trying to get away that quickly.
Until she runs into traffic; trying to flag a car to stop; until she runs by me screaming help me, help me, HELP. Until I try to grab for her and she keeps going, the man in pursuit, looking apologetic, saying shes coming down off of meth.
I follow. This girl is in trouble, and I dont know who this man is; here to help or hinder?.
He catches up with her, and I catch up with them. Hes holding her, and shes screaming and crying, and desperately trying to escape. He asks her about the drugs and she tells him her friend through them away. Shes not on drugs. She begs me to help her.
We all sit, she restrained in her fathers arms, on the risers the florists uses to display simple acts of beauty. She gets away again, but he catches her before she can run into the street, and brings her back to me. A crowd gathers. Someone asks if they should call for help. The father says Yes, please call.
This is all happening so fast.
Hes holding her now, so I call 911 and ask for police and an ambulance. The ambulance comes on, and I tell them There is a young girl here, shes hysterical, and is being restrained. I think shes coming down from crystal meth. How old is she? Her father tells me she is 17. (She is 17!) Shes 17, yes shes on crystal meth.
And there is nothing left to do but wait. So I hold her hand and wait. And she screams and begs and cries and struggles, and we wait. I take my gloves off to give her touch; a loving human connection. Its all I can offer. I wish for something more to give her, but all I can do is brush the hair from her eyes, tell her I know shes hurting, and listen.
A man comes, offering water, to calm her down. I think hes just gone and bought it for her. It ends up thrown in my face, and I am a bitch as she screams for me to leave, for me to help her for anyone to please, please help her, so she can go to John, so she can see her boyfriend. So she can get away from her father. Anything, just please help her.
A couple stands watching; silent witnesses.
Her father apologises, but its only water, and she is so hurt, so terribly damaged, there is nothing to apologise for.
Waiting and holding her, her tear stained lashes so close to my face. Shes so young and lovely. And when she breaks from us again and I have to grab her; she is so light, so tiny. She says she cant run anymore since she has no muscles left. When I hold her, she is softness. As her tears abate and I look into her eyes, it is my niece I see. This strung out crystal reminds me of what I have, what could be lost. And it breaks my heart.
Her skin is flawless, her eyes deep brown wells. She is so strong. This crystal shines. She wants help so badly and doesnt know where to find it; she is trying so hard. Her father wants her to go to detox. Please, so you can think clearly.
She begs me to make him stop. I tell her Im trying to help her, that no, I wont let her father take her, that Im helping her the best I know how, the ambulance is coming and Im staying with her until it arrives.
Waiting.
The waiting is endless. Her spirit flames. She is so scared and doesnt know why. This clouded crystal brightens and fades. Over and over she screams, bolts and struggles and rages. Her father and I do our best not to hurt her when she tries to flee. She cries and begs. She is calm. Then it starts over again. We sit and wait. We talk. She tries to run. We wait some more.
And it finally comes. I flag the ambulance down. The watchers all wander off. Ive let her go, so I stand back as the paramedics talk to her. She tells them its been two days since she used. And before that, she hadnt used in weeks. Shes trying to stop. Calm now, shes getting help.
When the police arrive, I too take my leave. To the end of the block. To my block. But I dont turn to go home. I sit and wait and watch. I need to know they take her away. I need to know she is helped.
And I am crying. All of a sudden I am crying, and I cant speak. It was all just so hard. Not a bad experience, j`ust hard.
Then the ambulance pulls away, and I see her father running towards me, coming to thank me. He tells me the police wont take her to detox. Shes 17 and they cant force her.
17!
She is being taken to the hospital, so maybe shell choose to admit herself.
I tell him that I know shes strong, that shell be okay. That hell be okay too. I believe in them. If a stranger can believe in them, he should too. I hug him, and take my leave.
And with every act of kindness I am seeking redemption.
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So I was walking home from the movies, and I see this couple running down the sidewalk towards me, playing catch me if you can At a distance, I think maybe they are in love, the girl is laughing and doesnt seem to be trying to get away that quickly.
Until she runs into traffic; trying to flag a car to stop; until she runs by me screaming help me, help me, HELP. Until I try to grab for her and she keeps going, the man in pursuit, looking apologetic, saying shes coming down off of meth.
I follow. This girl is in trouble, and I dont know who this man is; here to help or hinder?.
He catches up with her, and I catch up with them. Hes holding her, and shes screaming and crying, and desperately trying to escape. He asks her about the drugs and she tells him her friend through them away. Shes not on drugs. She begs me to help her.
We all sit, she restrained in her fathers arms, on the risers the florists uses to display simple acts of beauty. She gets away again, but he catches her before she can run into the street, and brings her back to me. A crowd gathers. Someone asks if they should call for help. The father says Yes, please call.
This is all happening so fast.
Hes holding her now, so I call 911 and ask for police and an ambulance. The ambulance comes on, and I tell them There is a young girl here, shes hysterical, and is being restrained. I think shes coming down from crystal meth. How old is she? Her father tells me she is 17. (She is 17!) Shes 17, yes shes on crystal meth.
And there is nothing left to do but wait. So I hold her hand and wait. And she screams and begs and cries and struggles, and we wait. I take my gloves off to give her touch; a loving human connection. Its all I can offer. I wish for something more to give her, but all I can do is brush the hair from her eyes, tell her I know shes hurting, and listen.
A man comes, offering water, to calm her down. I think hes just gone and bought it for her. It ends up thrown in my face, and I am a bitch as she screams for me to leave, for me to help her for anyone to please, please help her, so she can go to John, so she can see her boyfriend. So she can get away from her father. Anything, just please help her.
A couple stands watching; silent witnesses.
Her father apologises, but its only water, and she is so hurt, so terribly damaged, there is nothing to apologise for.
Waiting and holding her, her tear stained lashes so close to my face. Shes so young and lovely. And when she breaks from us again and I have to grab her; she is so light, so tiny. She says she cant run anymore since she has no muscles left. When I hold her, she is softness. As her tears abate and I look into her eyes, it is my niece I see. This strung out crystal reminds me of what I have, what could be lost. And it breaks my heart.
Her skin is flawless, her eyes deep brown wells. She is so strong. This crystal shines. She wants help so badly and doesnt know where to find it; she is trying so hard. Her father wants her to go to detox. Please, so you can think clearly.
She begs me to make him stop. I tell her Im trying to help her, that no, I wont let her father take her, that Im helping her the best I know how, the ambulance is coming and Im staying with her until it arrives.
Waiting.
The waiting is endless. Her spirit flames. She is so scared and doesnt know why. This clouded crystal brightens and fades. Over and over she screams, bolts and struggles and rages. Her father and I do our best not to hurt her when she tries to flee. She cries and begs. She is calm. Then it starts over again. We sit and wait. We talk. She tries to run. We wait some more.
And it finally comes. I flag the ambulance down. The watchers all wander off. Ive let her go, so I stand back as the paramedics talk to her. She tells them its been two days since she used. And before that, she hadnt used in weeks. Shes trying to stop. Calm now, shes getting help.
When the police arrive, I too take my leave. To the end of the block. To my block. But I dont turn to go home. I sit and wait and watch. I need to know they take her away. I need to know she is helped.
And I am crying. All of a sudden I am crying, and I cant speak. It was all just so hard. Not a bad experience, j`ust hard.
Then the ambulance pulls away, and I see her father running towards me, coming to thank me. He tells me the police wont take her to detox. Shes 17 and they cant force her.
17!
She is being taken to the hospital, so maybe shell choose to admit herself.
I tell him that I know shes strong, that shell be okay. That hell be okay too. I believe in them. If a stranger can believe in them, he should too. I hug him, and take my leave.
And with every act of kindness I am seeking redemption.
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
no:
You are so awesome! Someone's daughter, sister, love... So glad you were there to help. Like to think there are others that would help me or my friends/family if ever in trouble. Brother did the meth, went to jail, did more meth, now in prison. Crazy stuff. Thanks.
lx:
I am really talking about retaining a clear head. If you do what is right while keeping a level head about things then so much more can be accomplished; so much good can be done. It's more about passion. Passion is overpowering, and I don't want to be overpowered anymore. I just want to do what I know is right because it is right, not because it wrenches my heart. Then one can spend more quality time getting important things done and pushed through.