So I sit and I wonder when ill be home next. One month two months? One year or two years? Questions that bring no answers...answers that are not part of a solution. In the morning I rise to comfort a pillow that I wish I can call mine. A hopeless romantic looking to sweep her off her feet. The days are long the months even longer. Time fades as it transitions to black with no looking back in time to rebuild what I have now lost. I place my hands upon my face cracking my fingers to peer through. Empty screen and letters to match I write till I find the day of serenity. A day too far gone in the future it has no face. I pick myself up and I keep going as I have always been told. I do not stop accomplish the task ahead of you. Yet where does personal achievement and professional meet? I stand hands in palm and I begin to look back even deeper... Do I find more answers no..I find nothing but questions..where I have failed where I can advance making me question my own thoughts and morals. I drop my hands to my side and look around in wonder no answers for the questions I have with in..no truth for the ones that deserve it. My emotions are sad as much as my thoughts. More chrsitmas's alone more birthdays surpassed by the day of hours that hold no meaning. I drown my sorrows upon the liquid that screams out from within. alternate reality maybe the truth, I sigh as I think more. I can't make it stop..I sit in the chair and I begin to write more...words flow out of me like a small creek with minimal water for it to flow through...sadly the words beacon its way to the shore...but no safe harbor in sight. My body ravaged and torn and all can be cured with one call. A voice of hope a voice of will...a voice of something more than me...I look to my phone I answer: hello?......