So last night after the Naruto marathon I went out. I figured Brett was probably sick of me. I was sick of little tom. So i went out solo. I put on my new tight dress pants i got at H&M with my AC/DC shirt and the button down white shirt. I headed down to the Hollywood and Vine area to find a bar that wasn't the Vine bar. Passing Dragonfly I saw a ton of beautiful women. Then on a second take 2 thirds of them were holding hands. i figured I wasn't in the mood for that special kind of rejection that is lesbian rejection so I parked at the archlight's parking lot and went on foot.
After patrolling the area to tell the douche bag clubs from the hipster den's of infamy. I first walked in a piano bar. The place wasn't my kind of joint. It was filled with two things I was not interested: middle aged gay couples. it was heart warming seeing them all coupled up listening to second rate jazz. I finished my drink and headed out. My second stop was a bar called Burgundy, or the Burgundy Bar. the fucker was so dark it took me 5 minutes to get my eyes adjusted. It was one of those places that give me the creeps. Everyone seemed to know each other. There was no where to perch my self and work my semi pathetic mojo on a semi attractive woman with major beer goggles on. I left. I crossed the street and hit the beauty bar. The place was to kitschy. Again no strangers. The crowd was dressed more rockabilly/punk... I enjoyed the faces but had to leave. The place stunk like cosmetics. Plus I bar built to look like a beauty salon has a five minute irony limit, afterwards it is just lame.
I finally gave up and headed down Vine to the bar that share's it'name. As I walked in Iggy Pop's : I Want to Be Your Dog" was blaring. the crowed was the usual mix of hipsters and what not. Their was a suspicious amount of black and many girls with the whole betty page/morticia addams thing going. Then the music shifted to Bowie. I walked to a seat at the bar and ordered my drink of choice: " Jack on the rocks". As I sipped my bourbon and looked at a sexy brunette who seemed to flirt with everyone while her boyfriend/coworker slapped her ass. i smiled back at her thinking that as long as I don't talk to her her biker man won't cripple me. Then the music shifted to Bauhaus. I picked up my drink and walked around.
To my amazement this was some sort of a goth night. Mind you they didn't play the stupid EBM music or any of that crap. Just classic goth rock. Bauhaus, Sister's of mercy, ect... In the back true aging goths with their hair teased and shaved into giant puff ball mohawks were stomping and swaying to the tunes. It's been a while since I've been to a goth club. I enjoy the music but find the crowds that go there too comical to go there regularly. I hope this doesn't offend my Goth friends. I just think the subculture has become a joke, like all subcultures do eventually.
After watching a few people I sat down at the bar and noticed this red head making eyes at me. She was cute. A little on the big side, then again my standards since I have moved to LA have been raised so high... I made eyes at her. Trying not to stare but just catch a glance as if i was looking past her and our eyes just met by coincidence. I left for the john in order to sit closer to her when I got back. She eventual walked up to the Bar and ordered a drink for her and her effeminate man friend one of the things that suck at goth bars is that some of the "straight" men you are competing with are more girly than the cheer squad of a texas high school so you can never ever tell) As she walked t the bar she obviously looked at me and smiled a million dollar smile. I smiled back and tried acting cool. Still i tried talking to her but I couldn't say a thing. I didn't fumble with words. I had the intention to talk but i just smiled back and stared at my drink( a diet coke at the time)I figured I would ask her name before I left.
As I turned around she was gone. Her effeminate friend left alone with a dumbfounded look on his face. I just stayed until the bright lights were on. All the sudden you can see how thick the eyeliner is on. how much the foundation is making the acne worse.
So the moral of the story:
When a red head stares at you say hi!
After patrolling the area to tell the douche bag clubs from the hipster den's of infamy. I first walked in a piano bar. The place wasn't my kind of joint. It was filled with two things I was not interested: middle aged gay couples. it was heart warming seeing them all coupled up listening to second rate jazz. I finished my drink and headed out. My second stop was a bar called Burgundy, or the Burgundy Bar. the fucker was so dark it took me 5 minutes to get my eyes adjusted. It was one of those places that give me the creeps. Everyone seemed to know each other. There was no where to perch my self and work my semi pathetic mojo on a semi attractive woman with major beer goggles on. I left. I crossed the street and hit the beauty bar. The place was to kitschy. Again no strangers. The crowd was dressed more rockabilly/punk... I enjoyed the faces but had to leave. The place stunk like cosmetics. Plus I bar built to look like a beauty salon has a five minute irony limit, afterwards it is just lame.
I finally gave up and headed down Vine to the bar that share's it'name. As I walked in Iggy Pop's : I Want to Be Your Dog" was blaring. the crowed was the usual mix of hipsters and what not. Their was a suspicious amount of black and many girls with the whole betty page/morticia addams thing going. Then the music shifted to Bowie. I walked to a seat at the bar and ordered my drink of choice: " Jack on the rocks". As I sipped my bourbon and looked at a sexy brunette who seemed to flirt with everyone while her boyfriend/coworker slapped her ass. i smiled back at her thinking that as long as I don't talk to her her biker man won't cripple me. Then the music shifted to Bauhaus. I picked up my drink and walked around.
To my amazement this was some sort of a goth night. Mind you they didn't play the stupid EBM music or any of that crap. Just classic goth rock. Bauhaus, Sister's of mercy, ect... In the back true aging goths with their hair teased and shaved into giant puff ball mohawks were stomping and swaying to the tunes. It's been a while since I've been to a goth club. I enjoy the music but find the crowds that go there too comical to go there regularly. I hope this doesn't offend my Goth friends. I just think the subculture has become a joke, like all subcultures do eventually.
After watching a few people I sat down at the bar and noticed this red head making eyes at me. She was cute. A little on the big side, then again my standards since I have moved to LA have been raised so high... I made eyes at her. Trying not to stare but just catch a glance as if i was looking past her and our eyes just met by coincidence. I left for the john in order to sit closer to her when I got back. She eventual walked up to the Bar and ordered a drink for her and her effeminate man friend one of the things that suck at goth bars is that some of the "straight" men you are competing with are more girly than the cheer squad of a texas high school so you can never ever tell) As she walked t the bar she obviously looked at me and smiled a million dollar smile. I smiled back and tried acting cool. Still i tried talking to her but I couldn't say a thing. I didn't fumble with words. I had the intention to talk but i just smiled back and stared at my drink( a diet coke at the time)I figured I would ask her name before I left.
As I turned around she was gone. Her effeminate friend left alone with a dumbfounded look on his face. I just stayed until the bright lights were on. All the sudden you can see how thick the eyeliner is on. how much the foundation is making the acne worse.
So the moral of the story:
When a red head stares at you say hi!