distractions ....................
I have been letting myself be distracted by everything in the world lately except for my art. I am so ready to be back to me now. these last few weeks have been this whirlwind inside of myself. changes and love taking place. I dont understand alot of it , but I know that I have to come to grips with who i am and that my photography and my art are an integral part of who I am. And though you may care about people and want love and compassion in your world, you can not do things for them you have to do things for you and about you and what you want.
its ok to have those things in your life but you can not lose yourself in another person so far that you dont do the thingas you should. i have these wierd issues and this baggage that I am coming to grips with and finally getting rid of. I have been sitting at home doing NOTHING, for almost a month and now I finally have made some new friends , got back to shooting pictures again , and foound reasons to leave the house and it feels so good.
I kind of made a test out of the last few weeks, I decided to stop calling people and e-mailing people to see if they would contact me I called it the emergency friendship broadcast test and out of the 200 people in my phone only 5 or so contacted me in these last few weeks. how fucked up is that ?
so those friends that did come through I have become very close to and communicate with daily if I can. And I show my apreciation for them in every way I can
so heres to real people huh? at least some do exist
Chazz
I have been letting myself be distracted by everything in the world lately except for my art. I am so ready to be back to me now. these last few weeks have been this whirlwind inside of myself. changes and love taking place. I dont understand alot of it , but I know that I have to come to grips with who i am and that my photography and my art are an integral part of who I am. And though you may care about people and want love and compassion in your world, you can not do things for them you have to do things for you and about you and what you want.
its ok to have those things in your life but you can not lose yourself in another person so far that you dont do the thingas you should. i have these wierd issues and this baggage that I am coming to grips with and finally getting rid of. I have been sitting at home doing NOTHING, for almost a month and now I finally have made some new friends , got back to shooting pictures again , and foound reasons to leave the house and it feels so good.
I kind of made a test out of the last few weeks, I decided to stop calling people and e-mailing people to see if they would contact me I called it the emergency friendship broadcast test and out of the 200 people in my phone only 5 or so contacted me in these last few weeks. how fucked up is that ?
so those friends that did come through I have become very close to and communicate with daily if I can. And I show my apreciation for them in every way I can
so heres to real people huh? at least some do exist
Chazz
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
mortuusnox:
I like what you had to say about love. I've got a fuct up situation going on myself and should take some of your adivice. I'm still working on getting Sike to comitt to a day when we can go get shot by you. I'll call you whenever that happens.
seda:
I posted a new journal entry. Perhaps you would enjoy the read.