This is a poem by a first century BC erotic Latin poet named Catullus. I will first give the Latin then my own translation - all of Catullus' poems seem so modern - take note that my translation sticks tight to the original meaning:
Salax taberna vosque contubernales,
a pilleatis nona fratribus pila,
solis putatis esse mentulas vobis,
solis licere quidquid est puellarum
confutuere et putare ceteros hircos?
an, continenter quod sedetis insulsi
centum an ducenti, non putatis ausurum
me una ducentos irrumare sessores?
atqui putate: namque totius vobis
frontem tabernae sopionibus scribam.
puella nam mi, quae meo sinu fugit,
amata tantum quantum amabitur nulla,
pro qua mihi sunt magna bella pugnata,
consedit istic. hanc boni beatique
omnes amatis, et quidem, quod indignum est,
omnes pusilli et semitarii moechi:
tu praeter omnes une de capillatis,
cuniculosae Celtiberiae fili,
Egnati, opaca quem bonum facit barba
et dens Hibera defricatus urina.
English:
At the whore house and you guys the clients!
nine pillars down from the temple of Castor and Pollux
Do you think that you guys are the only ones that have dicks?
to you alone it is permitted to do whatever you want with the girls - to fuck?
You think that the rest of us are all goats?
Or, because you dull idiots sit continuously
100 (or is it 200 of you?)
Dont you think that I wont dare to let all you 200 vagrants suck my dick at once?
And nevertheless, Consider this!
Im going to graffiti that all you are dickheads on the front of the Temple.
For my girl, who has flown from my lap,
Having been loved so great as no girl will ever be loved,
On account of whom many wars were fought by me,
There she sits!
Being loved by all those good and noble men, and indeed, what is shameful,
Shes with all you peons who fuck in the alleys;
And you Egnatius! Foremost of all the long-haired faggots,
A son of rabbit-fucking Spain
Made noble because of your thick beard
And teeth brushed with Spanish piss!
Salax taberna vosque contubernales,
a pilleatis nona fratribus pila,
solis putatis esse mentulas vobis,
solis licere quidquid est puellarum
confutuere et putare ceteros hircos?
an, continenter quod sedetis insulsi
centum an ducenti, non putatis ausurum
me una ducentos irrumare sessores?
atqui putate: namque totius vobis
frontem tabernae sopionibus scribam.
puella nam mi, quae meo sinu fugit,
amata tantum quantum amabitur nulla,
pro qua mihi sunt magna bella pugnata,
consedit istic. hanc boni beatique
omnes amatis, et quidem, quod indignum est,
omnes pusilli et semitarii moechi:
tu praeter omnes une de capillatis,
cuniculosae Celtiberiae fili,
Egnati, opaca quem bonum facit barba
et dens Hibera defricatus urina.
English:
At the whore house and you guys the clients!
nine pillars down from the temple of Castor and Pollux
Do you think that you guys are the only ones that have dicks?
to you alone it is permitted to do whatever you want with the girls - to fuck?
You think that the rest of us are all goats?
Or, because you dull idiots sit continuously
100 (or is it 200 of you?)
Dont you think that I wont dare to let all you 200 vagrants suck my dick at once?
And nevertheless, Consider this!
Im going to graffiti that all you are dickheads on the front of the Temple.
For my girl, who has flown from my lap,
Having been loved so great as no girl will ever be loved,
On account of whom many wars were fought by me,
There she sits!
Being loved by all those good and noble men, and indeed, what is shameful,
Shes with all you peons who fuck in the alleys;
And you Egnatius! Foremost of all the long-haired faggots,
A son of rabbit-fucking Spain
Made noble because of your thick beard
And teeth brushed with Spanish piss!