Today's character defect: Pleasure-Seeking Opposite is quite surprising: Happiness - I'll have to explain this one for sure...
Happiness is the opposite because usually when I'm pleasure-seeking I'm depressed so the opposite of depression is happiness. So seeking happiness for the day was easy. I went to aftercare with the rehab that I was in and saw a bunch of friends and ate BBQ. It was a great meeting and it was great to see my good friends. We have a lot in comon as you can guess being addicts and alcoholics and all. Lots to talk about. We are a very close knit group. We share all kinds of stuff there. Just about anything goes. I learn a lot of good stuff there like how to prevent relapses which I really need especially this last month. This last month has been the hardest by far in my recovery with all of the obsessions to use and all of the using dreams and shit. It's been a tough road but it's definitely been worth it all. Sobriety is not easy by far but, definitely worth all the effort. I can't believe I almost have 5 1/2 months clean. I never thought I'd say I would be here today. I never thought I'd admit that I was an addict with all these character defects. Admitting that I was an addict was probably the most humbling experience of my life. It was really sucking it up and admitting that I was powerless over my addiction and that my life was truly unmanageable and taking that first step. I remember that a lot of tears were shed that day. I was trying to escape rehab. It was my third attempt at it. I really didn't want to be there. I really just wanted to take a handful of pills and be done with all the fucking headaches that had ensued. I was going through withdrawals really bad. It sucked. I guess the obsession to use was really over powering at that point. I didn't have the tools I needed at that point. It took a lot of talking to get me to stay at rehab but, once I decided to stay, I was there for the long haul and was committed to staying sober once and for all. Now my life has completely changed. Thank God for that. I don't think....No...I know...I never want to go back to that way of life....EVER....Again...It was self-destructive and so unmanageable. My life was so unmanageable that I couldn't eat, sleep, or drive my car without wrecking it. Now that is completely unmanageable. Sometime, I'll tell you my before story and how it all got started....at least the short version of it.
Till tomorrow....
Happiness is the opposite because usually when I'm pleasure-seeking I'm depressed so the opposite of depression is happiness. So seeking happiness for the day was easy. I went to aftercare with the rehab that I was in and saw a bunch of friends and ate BBQ. It was a great meeting and it was great to see my good friends. We have a lot in comon as you can guess being addicts and alcoholics and all. Lots to talk about. We are a very close knit group. We share all kinds of stuff there. Just about anything goes. I learn a lot of good stuff there like how to prevent relapses which I really need especially this last month. This last month has been the hardest by far in my recovery with all of the obsessions to use and all of the using dreams and shit. It's been a tough road but it's definitely been worth it all. Sobriety is not easy by far but, definitely worth all the effort. I can't believe I almost have 5 1/2 months clean. I never thought I'd say I would be here today. I never thought I'd admit that I was an addict with all these character defects. Admitting that I was an addict was probably the most humbling experience of my life. It was really sucking it up and admitting that I was powerless over my addiction and that my life was truly unmanageable and taking that first step. I remember that a lot of tears were shed that day. I was trying to escape rehab. It was my third attempt at it. I really didn't want to be there. I really just wanted to take a handful of pills and be done with all the fucking headaches that had ensued. I was going through withdrawals really bad. It sucked. I guess the obsession to use was really over powering at that point. I didn't have the tools I needed at that point. It took a lot of talking to get me to stay at rehab but, once I decided to stay, I was there for the long haul and was committed to staying sober once and for all. Now my life has completely changed. Thank God for that. I don't think....No...I know...I never want to go back to that way of life....EVER....Again...It was self-destructive and so unmanageable. My life was so unmanageable that I couldn't eat, sleep, or drive my car without wrecking it. Now that is completely unmanageable. Sometime, I'll tell you my before story and how it all got started....at least the short version of it.
Till tomorrow....
I agree with pleasure seeking as an opposite to happiness. a person cannot have or appreciate what she is looking for.