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Well, I have been doing a lot of make up lately.


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nikonphoto80:
good job, they look great.  
pyrate:
Thank you sir.
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nikonphoto80:
congratulations, i'm glad things are going so well now.
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5/14/2012
I feel like training wheels, or like the Mary Poppins of boyfriends. I am there to make them feel better about themselves until they dont need me anymore and can move on.

I think I was delusional to think that the guy in the painting she did could be me. I dont know if it means anything or not, I am sure it does...
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nikonphoto80:
im sorry things are not going so well, the painting can mean anything, being an artist I know this, it could be something from her past bad childhoods makes for great art, it could just be her interested in mythology, I knew an artist who did art about history, it had nothing to do with what was going on in his life, it was just something they were interested in.

well I would say just give it time, she may come around, if not at some point and time Im sure you will find some one else who will make you happy and who is happy with you, its no fun to be alone forever, Ive been alone for over 5 years, so I know more about being alone then most.
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5/11/12

As it turns out she has been following me on tumblr. She said, I saw that you cut your hair. I asked her where she would have seen that, knowing that I only posted it on facebook and tumblr. She told me that she saw it on tumblr.

I acted surprised that she would still check that, she said Of course I check it,...
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krito:
thanks for the comment on my blog smile
I hope your weekend was good smile hugs and kisses
nikonphoto80:
Well it does sound like there is some hope at least, sounds like she feels like there is something there still.

I wish I had a crystal ball as well, I would like to know if some one I have feelings for feels the same way, it is hard because I dont get to see her often since she lives so far away.
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I am going to post the journals I have been writing in the order I have been writing them. I don't write them everyday so this will give a chance for me to catch up.

5/1/12

Today is the second day with absolutely no contact. To have someone be so important to you and think that you are important to them and then not hear...
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nikonphoto80:
If you are asking about my friends band they are called Maidens IV, they are a all girl Celtic rock/folk band, they are sisters, they are a great live band, they are so much fun and they are about as nice as can be, I will post a video that has some bits from different songs, I have traveled all over the place to hang out with them, they are going to be playing a couple shows at the Celtic festival in Louisville later this year, so you can go see them there if you like.





Oh and just so you know the other group that are in my photos is a band by the name of Thistledown Tinkers, they also play Celtic music, they play in a couple of Celtic bands, I became friends with one of the guys from that band.
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I don't know why I am posting this because I know no one will read it. If you are confused as to why I am posting this go back and read my last blog. This is a letter I wrote to L a week after she broke up with me. All of the names have been changed to initials.

4/18/2012
Dearest L,

When we first...
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nikonphoto80:
Well I hope you and her can work things out, it sounds like you two are good for one another.
pyrate:
Thanks man, I hope so too.
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I figure it is time to fess up. I have been going through a really hard time this past month or so. I can't really rant about it in any other forums. Facebook, Tumblr, and Twitter are all out because I have way to many Real Life friends on them. Don't get me wrong, I am not hiding anything, I just know they either probably...
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nikonphoto80:
wow, it looks like you have slimed down a good amount since the last time i saw you, but that has been a long time, i hope all is well.
pyrate:
Yeah, since my divorce in October 2010 I have lost about 80lbs.
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Nothing Gold Can Stay (1923)

Nature's first green is gold
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

-Robert Frost
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I feel worthless, after everything I did, and everything I still would do she doesn't want me. Karma doesn't exist.