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I'm almost certain by now that the Dove exfoliating body wash is the true culprit of my skin irritation. I was using the bar soap of this type before, and after moving to my current location, found that there was not nearly enough water pressure to rinse properly. That sucked, and irritated my skin. Now that I've been using the sponge and body wash, I...
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So FJ seems to think I don't give a fuck about working for him. I do, but right now, I don't have the time or energy to let myself trip too much. Soon, I keep telling myself, this little BS situation will change.


President Bush is a fucking weakass bastard by now. The Senate Democrats THREATEN to filibuster a damned good UN ambassador, and what...
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And yet ANOTHER post today.


I just can't get over the idea that I made her think that all of a sudden I didn't trust her or want to be with her.

It sounded like she was telling me that she didn't trust HERSELF. And that scared me more than any back-of-the-mind fear I might have.


It was never about me trusting her or not,...
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Oh, my God. We're barely hanging on.



I love her so much. This is the first time in years that I've actually loved someone like I do her, and by now it's so much deeper with her then it's been with anyone before.


She thinks that I don't really want to be with her. I can't understand that, but she does.



I shouldn't have sent...
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Things have been pretty great for me the last week or so. I have some new Tangerine Dream CDs, one of which is particularly good. I just found out that there will most likely NOT be a settlement of 2.7 million to Tennie Pierce, which added to the cancellation of the OJ Simpson special, proves that there is still a little bit of sanity left...
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Is there anything left in this world
After all this continuous
Crashing, burning
I can't see our future anymore
And I'm starting to worry about you

Is there anything more to this scene
Than the always predictable
Lying, scheming
I can see your heart is in the air
And I'm starting to break away



So here's a bit of an update, as it's been a...
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So she saw it. I was checking up on her Myspace (trigger scary music here), and it said that she didn't know what to think of it. Which wasn't unexpected at all, but I wasn't sure really what she MEANT by it. The phone rang just then.


And ya know? She wasn't so bad at all. In fact, the biggest thing that she was able...
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What the hell I'm doing with this blog thing here.


As you would know (which by YOU, I mostly mean ME), I had about an 11-month gap between posts on SG, and now I've sent about a half-dozen of them in a very short amount of time.


They don't deal with "normal" subjects, or things that happen in my more mundane, day-to-day life, and they...
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So M and I are going to see "Penny Dreadful" on Saturday. Looks like it's going to be pretty good. I also found out that I really want to see "Borat" as well. She didn't seem so hot on that idea because "it's all political". Come on, M, you're a higher thinker than that. I've heard you go off on a few things that a...
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Ya know ... I think I can get some pretty good thoughts when I apply myself to them, but still, I can get myself to writing, and suddenly I'm going on and on, making a bigger deal out of something then it really is. I probably do this in real life as well. I wish I could just communicate telepathically or some shit, so that...
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"I don't like to have deep conversations", she says.

Damn it, this is not M speaking. Again. I talk to her on the phone when she's at home and tired, and who do I get? K. That damned, life destroying, overly insensitive, fuck-the-world-and-me-too-for-all-I-care defensive shield. I just want my M.


I actually had to blast her a little for this, and I'm not sure if...
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So I've discovered something. M is pretty fucking great. When she's being herself and not her fucked up defensive shell, she's about the coolest person alive.

Yesterday was so great, and I feel like a big weight has been temporarily lifted off of me. Why temporarily? Well, I know how things are, I know my insecurities, and I know that sometimes M just isn't herself...
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