I want him...

7

I don't even know who HE is or if he even exists anymore...

But EVERYDAY I long for his embrace :(

I can imagine what he feels like,

how I feel, wrapped up in his arms

what he smells like,

how the scruf of his 5oclock feels against my skin...

sometimes I catch myself thinking about how I would smile at him for ...idk why...
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bentaylor:
Im right here
littlejohn22:
I hope and I sense that you will find him as he is out there somewhere... I bet he is at a local festival that you should volunteer for...

Blog update

12

After losing what seemed like almost everything...I was able to steady my ground and gain a bit of yardage this year. I got tired of the dead end job jerk around so I went back to school after I realized my most recent venture was working in reverse, Again. "Out for blood" like a Vampire now...last week of externship, next week, then I will be...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
missdevhill:
@franie I have no clue. At this rate maybe summer :/ I have a small pt job at a call center till I can be settled
franie:
That's good you found something at least semi-stable until you can get going on what you really want to do.

Still not over last year; Moving forward like it's opposite day...

10

Tried to fake it but even I wasn't convinced by my efforts...Last day of the year and I still want to be out for blood. Forgiveness should be high on my list of resolutions in 2019 but it's not & wasn't the year before either. Idk how I'm gonna get through this next year jobless & full of hate.... I can't focus :( maybe I...
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littlejohn22:
I have an ear to rebound things off if you need it, but professional help can be an asset. I hope work finds you and forgiveness as well.... Shine on you crazy diamond

Maybe I'm just not on the right wavelength

16

Physical attraction - Thought I had it but I guess it slipped away. It probably was just another polar opposite, anyway. Can't get over the thought of my love someday walking into my line of site when I least expect it... & me just waving him on by like, idc.

VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
missdevhill:
Don't get me wrong :) It takes allot for me to get there...I mean, yeah, there are pretty petty people everywhere & I know I get side eye :/ but I would prefer all those things mentioned, over just having something nice to look at. I fall  infatuated with interesting people way to easily, I guess & the feeling seems to always fizzle out :( just thought I had something this time, that's all. Being on SG maybe makes it appear that I'm someone that shares herself easily...reality is I'm extremely reserved - like, I should be wearing a habit.
jaytee78:
Main thing is to love yourself. I think a lot of people use this site as an outlet for their inner person. As an example, I'm a very shy, quiet, reclusive and solitary person who has very few friends, but on here, I can be a lot more open and be person who I am behind the quiet mask. ❤️

Trying to remember what productive thing I did yesterday

 23

In a funk (as usual) & I'm trying to do at least on memorable thing daily...checked in with work, swept my living room & picked up BK....oh! Haven't been able to find my glasses in a few days so I ordered 2 more pairs for the year. I should do laundry today and hit club4448 before 7pm. Looking forward to when I will be able to walk around the block with Purdy the Pitoodle.
littlejohn22:
oh, this reminds me I have stuff in the dryer
wade1987:
at least you look happy, and comfy, and chores are no fun
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