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I always lovingly called Xenopus my Big Boy. He was the first male cat I ever had and he weighed in at 30 lbs. He wasn't super fat, he was just a big cat. He had the gentlest meow and would start to purr as soon as you touched him.

Last night I had trouble getting him to eat or drink. I would mix water
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So I borrowed and sold stuff to get Xenopus to the vet. Prognosis is not great. He has a massive infection, so now he is on antibiotics, if they don't work, he probably has cancer. The next few days are going to be hell. I have to decide what to do. Xenopus was close to my mother, and was there for her through her cancer,...
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My cat, Xenopus, I think is near his end. He has lost so much weight his bones are sticking out. He is breathing rapidly and shallow, but he cannot purr the way he used to. I don't want him to suffer, but I don't have any money to take him to the vet. It is breaking my heart to see him like this.

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kittykatznme:
i sold some stuff and borrowed what i could to take him to the vet.  he either has a massive infection, he is getting antibiotics, or he has some form of cancer.
kittykatznme:
Thanks for the wishes, he is in a beautiful ceramic urn next to my mother's ashes
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Life continues to suck at a quicker pace than usual. Jen has been feeling sick and nauseous, and throwing up again. Her legs have turned blue and are very painful. I don't know if it is her diabetes, fibromyalgia or her heart working at ten percent. She has not been eating much and gets tired just going to the bathroom. I have been strong through...
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thepsychicbunny:
I'm sorry you have to go through so much heartache. I hope you have somebody close to reach out to. At times of great pain friends can be so invaluable. I wish you so much good luck.
kittykatznme:
the suckage containes, she still can't live with me, and I don't really have someone that I can get a good hug from.  
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watching a movie about the world's most prolific serial killer for relaxation. My week has sucked ass once again. Jen has said twice that she is sick and tired of being sick and tired and wants to stop taking her meds. How am i supposed to deal with this? Her father is not doing so great, and that is stressing her out, which stresses me...
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kay:
Well it comes down to quality of life.
ryu:
Thank you so much, I'm very pleased with how he turned out!
Sorry to hear you are having such a rough time of things *hug*
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You know days like today are made for a bottle of lorazapam and a 40 of vodka. In my quest for some human contact, I have made someone think I was a stalker. I know sometimes i want too much too fast, but i am just so lonely these days. it gets worse when Jen is ready to give up on life, especially if her...
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hanke:
thats bad frown im sorry!
kay:
It is amazing how life can push us past a breaking point and then some. If she decides she is done though, support her as best you can. I do not envy either of you in this. Try to stay strong.

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ok, my last blog i mentioned that i am having feelings for someone i have been chatting with. We had some issues last week, i tend to want it all and now. we had some stalker issues, but i think we are getting past those. I still feel that i am developing feelings for this person, but meeting her is basically a pipe dream. I...
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dcruz:
Definitely hang in there, life can be tricky like that at times but I'm sure it'll get better!
kittykatznme:
It has been 5 months since she got the pacemaker with almost no improvement. Her fibromyalgia is causing her a lot of pain, but she can;t take anything for it except Tylenol. Her stomach is a mess, she can't keep food down, and now she is retaining water again. Finally, she went to the emergency room on Sunday because she had a bad headache that caused pain in her left arm. After 2 days at the hospital, she has cataracts, which may be causing the headaches. I feel like all I am doing is watching her slowly die.
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well, so much for peer support. i am having a rough time with Jen and her father both being sick, and only LaceyK offered any words of encouragement. Jen is not getting any better, even with the pacemaker and her father is having a really tough time with dialysis. Well,i guess that i am on my own with all this. Thanks Lacey.
laceyk:
You are welcome! If it makes you feel better this place gets quiet once in a while. It is amazing. It used to be bustling on here, since i checked in yesterday there have been only 5 new blogs by anyone! Crazy.

Dont' worry there are people out there! They just don't check in everyday smile
kay:
Just checking in on you.
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I work 6 days a week to help get the restaurant profitable again, and last night one of the owners insults my food and my abilities! I work my ass off for these idiots, i work at home without getting paid, what an idiot I have been. Why should i try to help someone when i don't get any thanks or recognition? I am so...
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laceyk:
frown
I have to beleive that in the end karma will set it right!
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Well, the shit is hitting the fan and i don't know what i can do. We saw the cardiologist today, and the news was not great. Her heart function has not increased, and she is retaining water, more than 15 pounds to be exact, none of this should be happening since she has the pacemaker. I read in her file exactly what her heart condition...
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kay:
*hug*
shellbell:
sending hugs your way
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I haven't posted in a while because I don't know what to say. It has been a couple of months since Jen's pacemaker surgery, she is a bit better but still weak. I thought that she would be stronger by now, and in less pain than she is. She is looking forward to a heart transplant, I am not so positive. I know that sex...
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