bittersuite102116

why cant i just enjoy certain moments. like right now i feel so good becasue its raining and theres football and baseball game on and its dark outside there seems to be no worries....but theres that goddamned mentality in my head saying it doesnt matter because you have nothing going for you and in a few hours this will all be over and lost forever.

maybe i will learn. but my mind has always been stubborn and doesnt want to learn new things i find to be trivial.

i wonder if anyone is reading all of this. i wonder why i care.

hopefully i dont sound like a linkin park song. *kills self