Saturday Nov 13, 2010

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Leave it to Stargate Universe to introduce me to some awesome new music. So now I shall share with the rest of the class. Enjoy, dears smile

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polygirlaz:
Very relaxing , it draws you and cradles you close.
comixbookgurl:
yay music!

Tuesday Nov 02, 2010

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These last two days I have felt so alone and for a completely different reason than depression. I tried taking a step outside of my box and reaching out twice, but instead I got nothing back. This is in regards to someone here in Korea that I work with. Perhaps they are right when they say you can't mix business and pleasure. I hate the...
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luther:
yeah. coworkers are lame. but it's good you're trying!
scary78:
Happy Veteran's Day! Hope you're doing better smile

Monday Nov 01, 2010

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Evening peoples

I thought I'd drop a note before going to bed since I haven't said much the last week. I'm doing alright. Monday has come and gone and its time for sleepy time. This week is going to be long though. Call it a hunch; call it a feeling deep in my stomach, sitting there like a stone. We shall see.

I've been trying...
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comixbookgurl:
Wheee
marsalli27:
Greatest flaw...hmmm hard one. I know what gets under my skin.... when people try to define others and how they live. When you define something you are attempting to confine it...life is breathing in and out and changing with the seasons. I do not believe that I am the same two days in a row...I will not expect someone else to be.

Wednesday Oct 27, 2010

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Well.... I'm sick because of a percocet withdraw so here I am at home from work for the next two days. Its nice because it goes into the weekend but I hate being idle. I hope this nausea and vomiting pass soon because I'd like to be able to eat some real food!

How are you all doing?
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dysfunction:
Awww withdrawals are never pleasant. I hope it passes quickly!
luther:
i'm baaaaack
stop being sick and let's go do fun stuff

Saturday Oct 23, 2010

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I really hate people here. It would take me far more time to explain my deep loathing for the people I spend 24/7 than I care to spare at the moment. Needless to say that people are so set in their cliches that they don't allow new people to be included. Fuck, I'm not even new. I've been here three months strong and apparently that...
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gigantits:
dude, that sounds horrible.... I feel for you frown
alkaline:
frown Im sorry, my friend. I do hope it gets better for you. I think its ridiculous and immature of army men to turn cliquey like that. Everyone is going through the same things and they should know that they wouldn't want to be alone in that situation.

Don't let it take you. You are better than all that.
Find solace in something..

Monday Oct 18, 2010

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Well its lunchtime Tuesday and I'm in Seoul in between appointments right now. I met with my surgeon a couple of hours ago so he could look at my crater and he says it is healing nicely but that it is red. This guy is a Major and has been to bat for me a couple of times in the past couple of weeks with...
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comixbookgurl:
*huggles*
soya:
Do you ? <3

Sunday Oct 17, 2010

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Ugh 1am Monday morning and I'm awake. Fuck me.

Well I ended up working the 24 hour duty shift on Friday and I about freaked out at the beginning of it. Slowly but surely my family is starting to lose support in me as the days roll on and I have no idea why. Everyone is pushing their own slightly different agenda on me and...
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_pie_:
You aren't alone- and are in my thoughts. Hope you get the help and support you are looking for :-*
bashier:
These people are despicable; I can not even describe the hate that I have for these lousy Human beings...do they not feel or care?! If only I could make them experience even an ounce of what you have been going through. My thoughts are with you, and karma is with them...

Thursday Oct 14, 2010

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So here's the update:

Yesterday I had called different members of my family to let them know what was going on and to let them know that I was thinking about harming myself. My mother was genuinely concerned of course and after she got off the phone with me she phoned the Red Cross. The Red Cross got a hold of my unit and my...
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s0cks:
From the girlfriend of someone who is depressed and considering cutting, I can tell you that the fear is not that the cutting itself is suicidal, just that it can escalate to that level. When cutting isn't enough of a release anymore, then what? That's where it is in my mind, anyhow.

All of my good thoughts to you, friend. Look how loved you are. I'm glad that you have a better situation to live in, at least. It isn't enough, I know, but it's a beginning. If you can slowly take out the extra stresses of your life, then you can begin to deal with the problem itself.
imspectr:
I'm sorry to hear about this. I hope that it turns around for the better. Do what is right for you and don't let anyone try to convince you of anything else.

As far as the cutting thing goes, I used to do it all the time and got the same response. "Are you trying to kill yoursellf?" No, I'm not that fucking selfish. There is a difference. People who have never had a reason to want to hurt themselves often don't understand it and are very harmful to be around. In my experience, they usually made things worse for me.

I know I've told you this before, but I want you to remember that you absolutely can always talk to me if you need to. In fact, I insist.

I'll be thinking of you and sending good thoughts your way. <3

Wednesday Oct 13, 2010

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I have no idea where to get the help I need. Everywhere I have turned to has been a dead end. I have a feeling there has to be a significant emotional event for me to get the message across to these people. I hate the military and its cold approach to anything especially helping its soldiers that need it. My caring and patience is...
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comixbookgurl:
*hugs*
akuma:
Surrounded by military all my life growing up with a vietnam vet dad... and seeing friends come in and out of it...I hope youll come out strong! Best wishes

Monday Oct 11, 2010

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I'm afraid today, boys and girls, that I don't have much of anything good to say about the comings and goings of my life. The last few days I've been in a funk and its no surprise to me at all. I've been having some problems coping since day 1 that I have been in Korea. I've done everything within my power to bury those...
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_smurfzilla_:
*hugs*
hang in there hun
luther:
hang in there buddy- let's go out for a drink when i'm back in town
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