So I've never used a blog before. But I'm willing to give it try because I had some interesting thoughts I wanted to right down.
Three weeks ago was the end of a five year relationship for me. One week ago was when I decided to test myself. I stopped looking at hardcore porn and have abstained from masturbating. I'm not apposed to either of those things(with in moderation). The short answer here is that, I wasn't sure if I was addicted to sex. I have a pretty high libido and had sexy at least 5 times a week(when I wasn't traveling). I also pleasured myself at least once a day. I know as far as addictions go, my addiction wasn't particularly unhealthy. This morning though, I was thinking about how amount of hardcore porn I watch has effected my actual desires. I'm glad that I'm realizing this, because I don't want the porn industry to dictate my desires. Well lets put it more lightly and not throw blame outward. What I want right now is to find my own desires. What makes me light up with passion. Where in me do my own desires reside, even if they are in a shadowy dark corner. Not looking a hardcore porn is the equivalent of sitting in silent meditation right now.
During this I'm glad there's a tasteful alternative because I still enjoy looking at the beautiful Suicide Girls who can make my loins burn. Think it's been a good practice too. To embrace beauty and not react to it(rubbing one out).
Three weeks ago was the end of a five year relationship for me. One week ago was when I decided to test myself. I stopped looking at hardcore porn and have abstained from masturbating. I'm not apposed to either of those things(with in moderation). The short answer here is that, I wasn't sure if I was addicted to sex. I have a pretty high libido and had sexy at least 5 times a week(when I wasn't traveling). I also pleasured myself at least once a day. I know as far as addictions go, my addiction wasn't particularly unhealthy. This morning though, I was thinking about how amount of hardcore porn I watch has effected my actual desires. I'm glad that I'm realizing this, because I don't want the porn industry to dictate my desires. Well lets put it more lightly and not throw blame outward. What I want right now is to find my own desires. What makes me light up with passion. Where in me do my own desires reside, even if they are in a shadowy dark corner. Not looking a hardcore porn is the equivalent of sitting in silent meditation right now.
During this I'm glad there's a tasteful alternative because I still enjoy looking at the beautiful Suicide Girls who can make my loins burn. Think it's been a good practice too. To embrace beauty and not react to it(rubbing one out).
akamrkent:
Also, this is a way safer place for this issue, way better than posting it to FB!