I'm feeling a little better today. Unlike my blog of about 10 days ago, i'm promising myself that i'm not going to have any regrets about what i'm about to post.
My daughter, Heather, came back from a ten day trip to Paris and Amsterdam. She showed me pictures and told me all about the trip that she and her friend took together. She had the time of her life.
One of the things she saw in Amsterdam was a sex show. Actually, it was a series of about 10 different performances. One of the segments she described was a BDSM scene between two women. It was obvious that she wasn't very interested in what she had seen, nor was she able to relate to it.
I acted very matter-of factly about what she was telling me. If it was anyone but my daughter, I would have gone into a long discussion about my own experiences, especially the things that Lyrical and I used to do. Of course, that part of my life would be the last thing i'd want either of my daughters to know about. Believe me, i'm not one bit ashamed of my interest and participation in BDSM. It's just not something one tells his children about, even though they're adults. There's no way they would understand.
I knew I was interested in BDSM at a young age. I got my first extended experience in it when I was about 22 years old. I lived in a commune for 15 months. While there I met an unbelievable young woman named Miriam, Mir for short. She showed me the ropes, so to speak. After being with her, there was no doubt in my mind that my feelings toward BDSM were for real.
I tried to introduce certain aspectsof BDSM to Annette in a way that wouldn't shock her, yet would allow me to get a feel for her interest, or lack thereof for that sort of thing. It was obvious that she wasn't, nor would she ever be into it in any meaningful way. She accomodated me every once in a while in very mild ways compared to the level and intensity that I would have preferred.
I wound up putting BDSM pretty much on hold during our marriage. It was the one and only thing that was missing from an otherwise perfect union. I wonder sometimes if Annette was looking down on me and was aware of the things I was into when I was with Lyrical. I'd like to think she'd be okay with what we were doing because it made me happy after a year and a half of being unable to move forward after her passing. I also want to believe that Annette came to love Lyrical for making me happy in so many ways beyond the BDSM.
I REALLY hope i'm right about this.
My daughter, Heather, came back from a ten day trip to Paris and Amsterdam. She showed me pictures and told me all about the trip that she and her friend took together. She had the time of her life.
One of the things she saw in Amsterdam was a sex show. Actually, it was a series of about 10 different performances. One of the segments she described was a BDSM scene between two women. It was obvious that she wasn't very interested in what she had seen, nor was she able to relate to it.
I acted very matter-of factly about what she was telling me. If it was anyone but my daughter, I would have gone into a long discussion about my own experiences, especially the things that Lyrical and I used to do. Of course, that part of my life would be the last thing i'd want either of my daughters to know about. Believe me, i'm not one bit ashamed of my interest and participation in BDSM. It's just not something one tells his children about, even though they're adults. There's no way they would understand.
I knew I was interested in BDSM at a young age. I got my first extended experience in it when I was about 22 years old. I lived in a commune for 15 months. While there I met an unbelievable young woman named Miriam, Mir for short. She showed me the ropes, so to speak. After being with her, there was no doubt in my mind that my feelings toward BDSM were for real.
I tried to introduce certain aspectsof BDSM to Annette in a way that wouldn't shock her, yet would allow me to get a feel for her interest, or lack thereof for that sort of thing. It was obvious that she wasn't, nor would she ever be into it in any meaningful way. She accomodated me every once in a while in very mild ways compared to the level and intensity that I would have preferred.
I wound up putting BDSM pretty much on hold during our marriage. It was the one and only thing that was missing from an otherwise perfect union. I wonder sometimes if Annette was looking down on me and was aware of the things I was into when I was with Lyrical. I'd like to think she'd be okay with what we were doing because it made me happy after a year and a half of being unable to move forward after her passing. I also want to believe that Annette came to love Lyrical for making me happy in so many ways beyond the BDSM.
I REALLY hope i'm right about this.
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The Depeche Mode shows at the
Hollywood Bowl were pretty amazing as always. This was my 14th time seeing Depeche Mode in concert since 1984. I was just a kid when I saw them back in 1984. As I danced, jumped, cheered, and screamed throughout the night, I realized that I have literally grown up with Depeche Mode. They have played an important role in my life from childhood, right through adolescence, and now into adulthood. I find that pretty amazing!