ferrara:
deep down I'm sure he's crying out for help. I've been in that stage in my life as well where you want nothing more then to wallow from society and the world seems like a bitter and hateful place. Looking back on it now i've realised that it was mostly due to the fact that my life was in a rut, my friends lives were flying by, I felt left behind. I finally developed a passion and goal in my life.. which is what definatly turned it around. Not saying that this is his solution, but he probally needs to change alot of the little things in his life. And I'm sure what you doing now is helping more then he wants to admit and more then you think. You are a true friend to him, which I'm sure at a time like this is very rare, and is just rare in general.
Anyways I really hope things turn around for him.. you sound like an amazing person though. smile
heff:
Hey there

Drinking excessively could be good for the body....nah i am just bullshitting you...it kinda sucks...but hey, your tolerance is up now....

Anyways, i suggest you have faith, and stay strong....granted his life may look bad, and he may be at rock bottom, but he is the only one that can get out of there....

You can not force it upon him, when he does want to come out, then be there for him. I have had many friends with depression problems, but you always have to have faith...just smile, its addictive....(ya i know it sounds lame, just trying to throw in my two cents)....there is no use for you to beat yourself up over it...be happy

Hope I helped..

--Heff--
rigadoon:
Hey there smile
Yea, I remember you from the group. I actually lived in Jersey last year and went to school there. I wonder how close we were to each other...
About your post... I don't know the circumstance, but I know what it's like to deal with someone who doesn't want to try anymore. It's exhausting, especially when you're the kind of person who will fight for everyone else. Whatever the circumstance, good luck. smile
redwildflower:
Thanks for the luck! It's a management job in retail. I just graduated college so I need some management experience under my belt. ANd seriously, booty calls or over rated. Or maybe it's just him.
tadzi:
hi there, not from north jersey, but from jersey. theres a lot of us, actually, and were cool people biggrin i would direct you to either derceto who is the group owner for the jersey group or TobasElly who owns the philly group. theres lots of events and im sure you could get an invite smile
sadistic_glee:

Venna said:
And it has been an uphill struggle to get here, but I've done it. And seeing him in this hopeless state.....isn't healthy for me. I find myself reverting back to the comforting aspects of my own depression because I am unable to deal with his. He has no hope, no life. And it's really taking it's toll on me.


I know how this feels, and how contagious depression can be, especially if you've been through it before. Don't be so sure that he doesn't want help though. When I went through depression, I pushed everyone away, even though all I wanted was for someone to be around and understand. He is lucky to have you, but he won't realise it until he fights his way out of his current state. Only he can do that. You can be there for him, like he has been there for you, and hopefully it'll be enough for him to realise he has something to fight for. Being there is all you can do. Take comfort in the knowledge that you are doing everything you can, and don't let his depression get you down. You are achieving more than you realise, but it still takes time. It took me five years, but I made it, and he can make it too if he knows there are people there for him. If you don't think he realises this, be direct and tell him. Hammer it into his head if you have to.

I hope things improve for both of you. kiss