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among the grapes of NY

Member Since 2006

Followers 51 Following 57

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Thursday Jun 15, 2006

Jun 15, 2006
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I love being forced to make huge decisions about my future....if I wasnt forced to make them I probably would not have a future. Making decsions are scary and exciting at the same time. I am not talking about what good butt jeans to wear out tonight or what to have for dinner kind of decisions....I am talking about the major ones we all make in life.
Decisons like when is the right time to quit a job, move to a new city, buy a house, get married, have or abort a baby, get clean or get dirty....

What major decisions have you had to make recently and how do you hope it will better your life? What choices are you to to scared to make and why are you scared?

HMMMMMMM

VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
lb:
i had to make a choice to leave a job tha ti loved but wasnt getting paid well to get one that is OK but makes me the money to support the ones i love...it was tough
Jun 17, 2006
kaleidoscopic:
funny you should ask that, because it's been life changing major decisions that have kept me offline and from talking to you these past few months...

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

i had a heart problem, then my bf decided he couldn't live with me anymore, then i thought that meant i was a bad person and went crazy depressed and self destructive, had to quit my job and move back in with my dad, but now i've seen that the decision even though it was made the worst way possible (he sends me an email breakup after over 2 years together with no goodbye...) is good because he was dysfunctional and messing me up and making me feel shitty about myself for the past few years and he needs therapy and he has a violent temper. all things i couldn't see until i was away from him because i loved the rest of him too much to be objective.



but now i'm free. i can explore my options, get a job in another state that will hopefully lead to a good grad school, and i can love women now without feeling bad or guilty. before i was too scared to do these things because i was afraid of losing him. but now i see he wasn't worth having for the way he treated me. and i can love myself well and i don't have some guy and his judgements making me question whether he's right about me being bad or i'm right about me being good. i am good. he was just too selfish and immature to get it and thought i had to be something i wasn't to be good enough.

i hope that this summer is turning out to be everything you'd hope it would be! warm wishes and big hugs to you and your little guy kiss kiss kiss

Jul 7, 2006

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