Got this the other day:
I wish I could be so self-confident about my work. I know it's good, I definitely do but I keep getting these moments where I say to myself 'What's the friggin' point?' Do you ever get that?
I get it all the time. But I wonder what the fuck keeps me going? I mean, I've been at it, since I was 12, sending my portfolio when I was 14 to marvel in hopes of getting work already ( ah , to be young), and I kept climbing, but one thing i have realized is this: I do this for me, by, me, and only for me. Sure you can get into the tic-tock argument of "The Audience" and the "Artist" and such, but as far as sitting somewhere scrapping away instead of just fucking around living life like others, i don't feel it. I love doing these works. At times I love working on all this shit, and knowing it's going anywhere but my portfolio under the stairs I have here. Because it's not for that, it's not for a gallery, it's not for a book, it's for me, because I love doing it. And that's it, that all i need.
Of course I'm talking for myself.
And f course, I don't have this confidence all the time, that's for sure.
But on the other side of things, I do a lot of work freelance where I can, I use my skills where applicable (I mix and match all the paint at the Body shop I work at) and move a step everyday to success: which is the day I can sit and draw, and not have to worry about the roof over my head or the food I'm going to eat. That to me would be fucking bliss, and thats it.
As far being an "artist" Whatever, I am, one, but maybe I don't live as one, and I'm not waiting on fame or money from it, though don't get me wrong, I'll hop like mad it it did, and use it to crush my enemies and promote my friends for sure. But yeah I'm not marking it in a calendar for sure.
Most of all remember this, in the secret os being an artist, at least what I have figured out: What you make, however you make it, it's worth shit. SHIT. To you. Now what gives it value is that everyone else, can't make that thing you idd, so then it becomes a question of value, and how assigns it. but for you you can make it all the time. That where you propel yourself , I think, as an artist.
Then again I could be blowing this out my ass, like some big hypocrite.
I wish I could be so self-confident about my work. I know it's good, I definitely do but I keep getting these moments where I say to myself 'What's the friggin' point?' Do you ever get that?
I get it all the time. But I wonder what the fuck keeps me going? I mean, I've been at it, since I was 12, sending my portfolio when I was 14 to marvel in hopes of getting work already ( ah , to be young), and I kept climbing, but one thing i have realized is this: I do this for me, by, me, and only for me. Sure you can get into the tic-tock argument of "The Audience" and the "Artist" and such, but as far as sitting somewhere scrapping away instead of just fucking around living life like others, i don't feel it. I love doing these works. At times I love working on all this shit, and knowing it's going anywhere but my portfolio under the stairs I have here. Because it's not for that, it's not for a gallery, it's not for a book, it's for me, because I love doing it. And that's it, that all i need.
Of course I'm talking for myself.
And f course, I don't have this confidence all the time, that's for sure.
But on the other side of things, I do a lot of work freelance where I can, I use my skills where applicable (I mix and match all the paint at the Body shop I work at) and move a step everyday to success: which is the day I can sit and draw, and not have to worry about the roof over my head or the food I'm going to eat. That to me would be fucking bliss, and thats it.
As far being an "artist" Whatever, I am, one, but maybe I don't live as one, and I'm not waiting on fame or money from it, though don't get me wrong, I'll hop like mad it it did, and use it to crush my enemies and promote my friends for sure. But yeah I'm not marking it in a calendar for sure.
Most of all remember this, in the secret os being an artist, at least what I have figured out: What you make, however you make it, it's worth shit. SHIT. To you. Now what gives it value is that everyone else, can't make that thing you idd, so then it becomes a question of value, and how assigns it. but for you you can make it all the time. That where you propel yourself , I think, as an artist.
Then again I could be blowing this out my ass, like some big hypocrite.
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I'm sure that wiped the links out, too. Sorry 'bout that.
Have you signed up for Warren's Engine site?
I signed on to Engine a few days before everything broke and poked around--it looks neat. The forum basically looks like the old WEF, with the same folks running around. It should be really neat once everything works.