Sorry about your loss. Hope everything manages to continue somewhat stable. Don't feel bad about enjoying your own company, you are your own best friend. I had a friend from my unit killed in Iraq, and there are no pictures, no video, no nothing of his field memorial... It was just us, those of us that served with him, his brothers... Easiest way to feel better sometimes is to just be by yourself. Don't mistake the humble, quasi-antisocial part of you as something bad. We should all strive to recognize that part in ourselves.

It'll be ok. We all muddle through, I guess that's the best we can hope for in this world anymore.

i am sorry, too, for your loss. thank you for the enouragement. i'd like to hope i am returning the favor, but i think NickySonic summed it up with "we all muddle through." he's right, but in a positive sense. it's what we were built for, muddling. we're good at it. you'll find the strength you need. it's there, even if you have to dig a little.

keep on keepin' on, sister!