tigerlily

awesome kick the bucket stories, everyone!! thanks!

so i'm in the process of MAJOR purging in my house of years of accumulated crap , and i came across this letter from 1990, written by my ex-highschool skater punk boyfriend, who was by that time just a friend. for some godforsaken reason, he joined the air-force after graduation, and hated it so bad he purposefully damaged his knees to get an honorable discharge. in the midst of his angst, he wrote me this letter, with some of the funniest fucking questions...and i thought i'd share an excerpt.

"Have I still not subscribed to the blindness around me, or am I overlooking it's vision? Am I a pitiful son of a bitch, or what? Does anybody else ever get nervous when they are naked in front of the head on a coin? Would you still respect a serpent if it wore red fingernail polish? Which makes less sense: a waxed floor or a textured ceiling? Is it right to be happy about killing a roach when it's corpse lies under the washing machine? Does a three toed sloth ever feel virtually useless? Would you be scared if a needle smiled at you? Do elves need lawyers? Are you worried more about the answers to the questions or my mental health? Do you ever wonder why I am so compelled to be nasty toward you?...."

and on it goes. maybe i'll share more later.
if you know the answers to any of these.....