theinsomniac

Life is chaotic these days. Not necessarily bad, just unpredicable and busy.

My work life is stressing me out. Being on the bottom rung of the ladder means that all the mistakes that are made as assignments and projects are passed around all get funneled my way. Also, it usually means that there's little time to finish, with little room for error. So, when other peoples mistakes don't get fixed perfectly, in the not-enough-time I am given to fix them, guess who gets all the blame?

And guess who doesn't get credit when things go well?

I haven't made much progress in finding a new place to live. I will be visiting a couple open houses over the next couple of days. Seriously, why would someone post an ad on craiglist or something akin to it, and then just never answer the responses it gets? Even a notice that the room has been filled would be nice. I'm e-mailing people within hours of ads being placed, and getting nothing. I doubt I will be able to find a place before I leave for Oregon on the 21st.

At least I'm seeing a cool girl. We get along great. The problem is, and I have been honest about this with her from the beginning, is that I am at a place in my life where I'm finally ready, and feeling the need, to not be commited to one person. I've accepted the fact that I am not in a monogamous frame of mind right, but parts of me still feel guilty for not following the traditional relationship scheme, and for not being willing to be as committed as I know she would want me to be. I hope I don't end up hurting her, but if I am not honest to myself, how can I be happy? By being honest with her, I feel like it establishes more trust in our relationship. Am I wrong in that?