thefuckoffkid

So why do I love my girlfriend?

So, I am up in Sydney visiting her. We live twelve hours apart (driving, or one hour by plane) and although we talk several times daily, we only see each other every month or two.

She makes me laugh more than any other person I've ever met.

So, while I visit her, I am also slave to her clanky sticky keyboard when I go online. I type fast. Too fast for this crappy set of keys that stick and miss letters. Particularly double letters, where my fingers double-tap so fast on a single key it only registers one of my two hits.

I was explaining this to my girlfriend Kate while we were out at dinner tonight, telling her that unless I checked carefully, the words with double letters would have only single letters in them.

So, we start talking as though double letters don't exist. She turns out to be much much better than me at doing this spontaneously. I was telling (sorry, teling) her that she would be proud that I had abstained for weeks from posting to the Current Events board, and she just waited for me to finish then looked at me and said "Weks. Curent."

This went on for a while, with me making more and more mistakes until she just stopped me and said "You're not very god at this, are you?"

This of course made me try harder, which reduced me to speaking slowly and deliberately, in a way that reminded me of the "Fiter, Hapier" speech from Radiohead's "OK Computer" because I was trying to visualise each word before I spoke it. I would finish a long deliberate carefully enunciated sentence, and she would look at me with raised eyebrows and say with mock reassurance, "Oh, god."

By the end of this, I was reduced to fits of laughter at my own incompetence. But at least, at the end, I was able to declare her the winer.