I think you need an outlet dear.. I use photography and music, try something like that.

At least you recognize that you have these issues and you are trying, that's all you can really do.

Keep your head up xoxox

I understand fully what you mean. Sometimes saying what is inside you stays there forever, and other times it just starts coming out one thing at a time. The first time you say to yourself, I don't believe I just said that, and are either proud or embarassed depending on the statement. After a while they just seem to escape from within, and each time some internal pressure is lifted.
I too deal with anger and fear but lately have been telling people that piss me off just what I think, but there are still fears inside, cant get rid of those gremlins.
If you ever want to talk, I am here.

you'll never be a jedi that way!

take up guitar or sing in a rock band, that worked for me. now drilling holes and hammering have to do...