had another session with my idiot shrink today. i think im done with him. he doesnt help at all he just tells me things i already know or things that are completely wrong. well at least this session wasnt as bad as last time. last time he told me i was depressed because i needed to find god. now i may not be a very good "christian" but i do have my own set of belief...which he out and out said were WRONG because its not word for word what the bible says. now correct me if im wrong but i thought psychiratrists were supposed to help you figure out whats wrong with your brain, not preach to you. he also drew a "Love-Fear" line (tho he didnt call it that) just like that gym teacher in donnie darko. yes seriously. he seemes rather perplexed when i laguhed at him. this week wasnt as bad as that but it was still useless. the waiting room was interesting however, cuz there was a woman with tourette's who keps blurting stuff out and at one point she ran up to the reception counter and was like "i hear violins! wheres that violin music coming from??" and the person at the counter told her there WASNT any, and she just went "oh" and sat back down
i still feel like crap for no particular reason. for a while it seemed like my depression was letting up but ive been having a pretty bad bout this week. im not even enjoying playing videogames. i kinda just wanna go to sleep. not cuz im tired but just to make the time pass. but if i did that would make me not be able to sleep tonight, and then i couldnt get up in the morning and everything would get out of wack. sooo i just sit and watch tv since i feel to crummy to DO anything. im also having this weird thing where everything feels too....open. even my tiny little room feels unsettlingly large. i dunno what the hell's going on. i kinda feel like crawling under the desk, or building a fort out of sofa cushions like when i was little(tho im not gonna, cuz then id REALLY seem nuts). this's never happened before and im hoping it will pass soon.
i wish i wasnt so lonely. even if a girlfriend is too much to hope for, i just wish there was someone here to talk to
i still feel like crap for no particular reason. for a while it seemed like my depression was letting up but ive been having a pretty bad bout this week. im not even enjoying playing videogames. i kinda just wanna go to sleep. not cuz im tired but just to make the time pass. but if i did that would make me not be able to sleep tonight, and then i couldnt get up in the morning and everything would get out of wack. sooo i just sit and watch tv since i feel to crummy to DO anything. im also having this weird thing where everything feels too....open. even my tiny little room feels unsettlingly large. i dunno what the hell's going on. i kinda feel like crawling under the desk, or building a fort out of sofa cushions like when i was little(tho im not gonna, cuz then id REALLY seem nuts). this's never happened before and im hoping it will pass soon.
i wish i wasnt so lonely. even if a girlfriend is too much to hope for, i just wish there was someone here to talk to
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
As soon as I started to read about your Therapist...I immediately thought od that DONNIE DARKO deal...and when you mentioned 'Love-Line'???
LOL!
Ya know...I call Therepists THE-RAPISTS for A reason!
I know, It seems like we are all alone on this fuckin planet, but when we come up with A BRILLIANT Million Dollar idea?? Someones done it. So, I hope you can see things in a different perspective, and realize that we ALL walk in those shoes, it's just Everyone has a different style of em...And if you want to build a Sofa Cushion Fort? DO IT! Why the Hell Not?? If as children it was 'cute and imaginative' why the hell isn't it anymore?
You Go and Build that fucker, Jigsaw, and whatever else you feel you gotta do with your head and body to feel good, As long as you are not bothering, or hurting anyone...Why the FUCK not?
Besides...Sofa Forts can be awfully kinky...get the right gal, and Hey! You have The best fuckin Doctors exam room there is!
At least thats what I was told way back...Hmmmmm.
Keep Playin and Slayin Jigsaw!
OOogaBOOoga...
Didn't ask to be...I was just Lucky when it came to handing out 6th senses, and DO NOT EVEN THINK OF MENTIONING that film...It had it's moments, and OOoooOOOoooooOOOOoo it was done by Shamalyan...DEEP! (sorry, It REALLY ruined it for me after I saw THE VILLIAGE, which I was HOPING was going to redeem him! But it turned out to put me to sleep!)
Anyhow...Yup, I do...and I also Have people whom I am apprenticing on Egyptian/ Thelemic Magick. You could say I walk The Left-Handed Path...(That means I am A Rebel Magus) I am not some silly heavy Metal Obsessed Satanic Bible worshipping Cast-Off...I actually just found out I am not the My-ancestors-fought-for-the-South-Piece of White Trash I had thought...(well I am...BUT, ) I just discovered that My Family Name/line goes WAAAAAAAAAY back & we Have A Castle in FRANCE! and Who planned, constructed, built, resided in, and did HEAVY Magick in it??
The Knights Templar!!
(If you wish to see more...Check it out...
Sadies Family Castle
...and If ya Don't, I'll Turn you into A Lover of Popular Horror!! ("6th SENSE" anyone??