stosbetlp

Last night was a really fantastic night for me.
I went to sleep around 5:30 am and now It's 9.. I've been awake about half an hour.
Three hours of sleep.. what the fuck is that? How the hell did I wake up on my own?

I'll tell you how..
Even though I had an incredibly super fantastic night with my head far far away from thoughts of Scott, I still managed to dream about him. And of course said dream woke me up.

For years before I had met Scott, I hadn't had a single dream.
Then there were a couple while we were dating..and they were all about him which was nice and sweet and such because he was my boyfriend and I was dreaming about him.. It was one of those "awww.." things..
Then there were the obligatory after break up ones which were just like the ones while we were dating.. and I'm convinced those were there just to spite me and make me cry more.
In the months that he was cheating on his girlfriend at the time with me, I had several dreams about having his baby.. They were always really crazy and out there for example.. from a previous blog I wrote on a different site..

That was just the first of many.



But they'd all stopped now.
My dreaming had calmed down and were back to their normal pre-Scott self and were keeping well to themselves. And then this morning... It was random and odd and I didn't know most of the people in it.. but Scott was all smiles and jokes with me and very desperately trying to shake some girl that was their.. he obviously wanted her gone. And then at the end some alarm went off and an announcement that said '7 minutes remaining' came on over the PA system. And then everyone was rushing around trying to get dressed.. and before this point I hadn't even taken notice that we were naked... I ended up putting on Scott's shirt and giving him another one.. Not sure what happened to the girl at this point.. but then Alfredo's [Scott's roomate/best friend] family showed up looking for him and he was standing out in the hall. Weird thing is his family was an old white man and a twenty-ish year old boy with flaming red hair and freckles... Alfredo's family is very Mexican...


Oh well needless to say, this was like 'the end of the world' and I guess that's what woke me up.

It's just really gay that I have to dream about Scott when I'm perfectly content with my life and doing a really good job of existing happily without him in it.

I guess I'm gonna go lay back down in bed and see if I can get another couple hours of sleep because I for sure as hell won't make it on three.

exhaustedly yours,
Stassney


[edit 11:27: I went back to sleep, Dreamed about him yet again. This time it involved him lying to his new girl so he could go hang out with the one he was 'desperately trying to shake' in the previous dream. I don't understand this...]