snakeplissken

I survived front row at Buckethead, and wandering through what must be Portlands' shittiest parking garage at Burnside and 11th. The show was a great one as usual. The roommate and I made it to the front center thanks to a cold wait outside the event. All was good until between the Portland Cello Project and Buckethead when some drunk bitch decided to make her way to the front, or at least to right behind me and my associate. That's all the farther we let her get, and she wasn't happy. First she was just obnoxious, asking everyone in the area if they had weed. Then she started just being loud and began trying to squeeze in between the two of us. That wasn't happening. Then she just starting laying on both of us and jumping around. Basically shoving and elbowing everyone around her, including all the kids. That went on for awhile and when she found out she wasn't getting through she moved down a few feet and started shoving around some kids, who looked a little freaked. This didn't sit well with a big bald guy next to her. He shoved her and she shoved back. This went back and forth for a minute and was getting pretty violent, until bald guy played his trump card. He moved. The old sidestep. And she fell pretty hard. This was about the time I motioned security over and they 86'd her. And the crowd rejoiced. Next up was the toy giveaway. He does that at every show. And people are absolutely rabid about it. I got crushed pretty hard, but of all the hands outstretched he put one right in mine. Sweet. I gots a toy!



After that the crowd started pressing forward really hard and I started to get a bit crushed. This was our cue to exit stage right, and we did posthaste. I'm too old for that shit.

As for the world's shittiest parking garage, I managed not to get stabbed or mugged getting to my car. Quite surprising really. Words really can't describe how creepy this place was. Bwah. I should have taken pics. Oh well, next time.