'Childhood is over the moment you know you're going to die.' - Top Dollar - The Crow
Do you remember that moment? I do, I was in 4th grade, living in Weiser Idaho again. Previously in the day I had walked home from school with a couple of friends. As we came upon my house we heard screams. My stepfather had shown back up and was proceeding to beat the fuck out of my mom on the front porch. I watched for a moment, horrified. Then I ran, ran to Roxie's house, Roxie used to babysit me and my little brother when my mom needed to pick up a bar-tending shift, that's what I assume she was doing back then. I don't remember my mother ever doing anything but working as a Bartender or Waitress.
So I ran to Roxie's house when I couldn't find the cop that was usually sitting at Park Street Market when school got out. I ran to her house in tears. I really dont remember if the cops got involved in that incident or not, there were many such instances and they seem to run together a bit. I do remember my mom picking me up. Her face was completely swollen and she had a horrible black eye. She took me home and apologized, apologized for something HE had done, apologized for getting her ass kicked in front of my friends and our neighbors.
I ate my dinner that night and got in the bath before bed, as I sat there soaking in the hot and bubbly water, I replayed the scene in my head of my stepfather standing over the top of my mama, punching her like she was nothing but a piece of leather and stuffing. I though about how he could have killed her, how she could have died from what he was doing to her. And then it hit me, everyone dies, she's going to die, I am going to die.
I sunk under the water but the tears still came.
Do you remember that moment? I do, I was in 4th grade, living in Weiser Idaho again. Previously in the day I had walked home from school with a couple of friends. As we came upon my house we heard screams. My stepfather had shown back up and was proceeding to beat the fuck out of my mom on the front porch. I watched for a moment, horrified. Then I ran, ran to Roxie's house, Roxie used to babysit me and my little brother when my mom needed to pick up a bar-tending shift, that's what I assume she was doing back then. I don't remember my mother ever doing anything but working as a Bartender or Waitress.
So I ran to Roxie's house when I couldn't find the cop that was usually sitting at Park Street Market when school got out. I ran to her house in tears. I really dont remember if the cops got involved in that incident or not, there were many such instances and they seem to run together a bit. I do remember my mom picking me up. Her face was completely swollen and she had a horrible black eye. She took me home and apologized, apologized for something HE had done, apologized for getting her ass kicked in front of my friends and our neighbors.
I ate my dinner that night and got in the bath before bed, as I sat there soaking in the hot and bubbly water, I replayed the scene in my head of my stepfather standing over the top of my mama, punching her like she was nothing but a piece of leather and stuffing. I though about how he could have killed her, how she could have died from what he was doing to her. And then it hit me, everyone dies, she's going to die, I am going to die.
I sunk under the water but the tears still came.