rowanmayfair

Every muscle in my body is aching from tension, My stomache is doing flips & I just finished crying for the second time. Today is the first day my exhusband is taking my twins out on his own. And to make it worse he's taking them into the city. So what? you say he's they're father, but what you don't understand is that I've raised these children on my own since he walked out on us when they were 1yr old. He's also not the most responsible person out there. He doesn't realize how difficult it is to handle two 3yr olds without another person with you to help. One runs one way, one runs the other, who do u go after? I should really be happy that I'm finally getting a break & he's taking some responsibility for them but I'm so scared somethings going to happen to them, they might walk off, or run into the street, or worse. And to be honest it plain hurts. Seeing my children walk off with him, my little girl waving "bye mommy" & my son jumping into his car seat with a big ol smile on his face. I just have this fear that as they get older & spend more time with him they won't want to be with me anymore. I'm the one who has to be the disciplinarian & he's the fun guy. Daddy buys the toys & mommy only buys clothes, & shoes, & food & diapers. Anyway I'm going to stop this pity party before I bum you all out. I think I'm just going to climb back into bed & sulk