rexx

sunday.
woke up alone, its cold,
two p.m..
look to see snow still falling out there.
yesterday's sun,
gone.
shower,
its hot and i linger there
for awhile
draw in the tiny steamed up window
to watch the snow.
make toast and fried eggs,
brew coffee and read.
down a pot.
become lost in music and scented smoke.
fixate on the dilapidated shed with crooked window
i always admire when sitting here,
bare-skinned,
looking out of mine.
imperfect and beautiful. and always there,
it would look great on film,
in black and white.
turn to the bed,
see the sea
of blankets in tumult.
so much lingers there.
i'm lingering there
in dreams
from which i always awake too abruptly
i turn back to the window
feel a silly dismay, as my flakes
have ceased to fall, for now.
another pot,
another book,
put the needle on the record...
life is a continual cycle of death and rebirth,
of sleeping and
waking.
i always look back,
once more.
like clinging to a dream,
not wanting the eyes to adjust.
shift in my chair, back towards the window,
the snow is falling again.
i lost track awhile ago of when asleep, or awake.
its all just life.
i sometimes take notice
of the seemingly unnoticeable blink
of pale doe eyes,
drenched in black.
and every time i think
"...it was the best dream I've ever had."




oh, yinz.

hi

as usual time is running out so just a few quick thoughts and who really wants to read more than that anyhow?

the unexpected "negativity" of my bank account is the result of old habits dying hard.
karmakarmakarmakarma.

one can't be mad at karma.

a momentary lapse. tis over now.
vague though if you've known me for awhile you may be able to figure it out.

i went to a zen buddhist meditation session with my roommate last night.
i of course only view buddhism as a philosophy, not a religion, but i've been wanting to learn more so it was a refreshing change of pace.

i read tristessa the other night. its less than one-hundred pages and truly beautiful.

i still love my job.

i've been almost one month ciggie-free!
virtual pats on rexxy's back, anyone?


despite my broke-ness i'm antsy and in search of adventure so i'm hitching a ride to dc tomorrow after work to see gifts from enola . then riding the magic school bus with them and the boy back to harrisonburg, va for a weekend of shenanigans. and sex. lots of sex.

I GOT A BED. HALLE-FUCKING-LUJAH!
fuck if i spelled that wrong.


i'm going to be flat broke for the next two weeks, as usual. but i have food in my kitchen and lots of books to keep me busy and my moosie the pitbull and five amazing roommates for company so i'm not worried in the least. oh, overdraft fees due to bars not charging my account till five days after the fact. what is this money we speak of anyhow? unexpected broke is like walking across one of these here pittsburgh bridges on a windy day, opening your wallet and watching it all flutter to the murky waters below.

perhaps i should care about it more, i don't.

snapppp my time is out in three fucking minutes. I NEED MORE TIME FOR BREASTS AND VAG AND BLOGS!

i miss yoouloveyou hopelifeis awesomeawesomeawesome awesome and if its not, make it that way.


<3 Rexxy