perhapsevil

I opened up the fart canisters to see what they smell like.
Big mistake.
My room now smells like skunk.

Christmas eve Sister, Mattagascar and I ate at Norm's (they never close).
Then we watched Manchurian Candidate becasue Sister has a thing for the Denzel.
The guy at Hollywood Video looked like he should be in prison. Sister says he looks like Sabretooth.



Turns out I went to elementary school with him.
And I kicked his ass when we were kids.
Weird.

Brother got me this for Xmas:



Last year it was flip flops and a lava lamp.
It makes me wonder who's tree he swiped them from.

He was in unusually good spirits.
Won at poker the night before.
Bought everyone alcohol
And was ever ready to spike my coffee everytime I turned around.
He played reggae while we ate christmas dinner.
Oh Brother.

damn.
I'm always forgetting things around Xmas time.
This time it was my brother's girlfriend.
Who made me a lovely purse for xmas.
Yup, I didn't get her anything.
Asshole me.

Mom was drunk
Which meant mom was huggy and kissy all night.
I was fondled by mom.
Yuck.

Mom made me talk on the phone to my Aunt Laura who I've seen once in the past ten years.
And then to my cousins whom I've never met.
Awkward.
"It's snowing there? Man i could've gone to the beach today and gotten a tan!"

Sister and I escaped
Went and saw The Aviator.
It was good.
But I just kept wondering when Leonardo is going to reach puberty.
I like Cate Blanchette but not in this,
her and Leonardo DiCaprio just looked awkward together.

Being at the Block renewed my hatred of people.
And I know this for a fact.
If you wear Uggs I probably hate you.

Been saying this lately.