2009 is over
And all I can think is "Good riddance"
This year has been pretty hellacious, full of twists and turns, ups and downs, and unneeded stresses that have only hindered everything I have hoped for. I've discovered new friends and rediscovered many of my old ones. I have seen places and done things I have come to cherish as moments of true happiness. On the other hand I've had moments of severe discourse, of pain and self-doubt, and worst of all, moments where I came within an inch of that line that is so clearly defined as life, and giving up on all of this. I've seen clarity, and I've made decisions I have come to regret. I'm ending 2009 on a wild card moment. It's really something I didn't expect, but am also taking with strides. Something that panic was attached to, but not directly caused by. Something that will change my life. I welcome 2010 with open arms, and hope it to be as enlightening as 2009.
Also, I turn 20 next month. As I look back over the last decade of my life, I see that I have come a long way, from a lonely little kid who tried just to fit, to being a blooming artist just clawing for survival. I work a job that is more stressful than it should be, I push myself to the limits every day, and I worry about the little things, when the big things don't even phase me. I am no different than I was ten years ago. The difference is a sense of assurance, a feeling that I will overcome if I just keep my head steady and my mind at ease. I feel more alive than ever. I have awoken from a medicated coma, where I was, as eloquently as stated by the band Dredg, a seashell in a sea of shells. And as it follows, I have planted my own seeds, and now as I reap what I have sown, I feel as if I have left that behind. I left the medicines, the doctors, and the criticism behind. This is a turning point in my life, and with that same wild card that I end 2009 on, I end my first 20 years on earth on.
This is where life takes a turn.
This is where I can run and pretend I still fit in within the ruins of my childhood,
Or I can embrace the future, and be the man I need to be to move on.
I could say that I can only hope for this next decade to trump the last,
But I won't.
Instead I will say this.
The future is mine to control. I intend to do exactly that. I intend to be the man I need to be. I intend to move beyond everything I am and everything I have been.
My life is changing. And I will adapt as it does.
Happy New Year, my friends, my enemies, my loves, my past, and my world.
Here's to life, Here's to happiness, and Here's to the Atom Bomb, may we survive our own hatred.
-TBM
And all I can think is "Good riddance"
This year has been pretty hellacious, full of twists and turns, ups and downs, and unneeded stresses that have only hindered everything I have hoped for. I've discovered new friends and rediscovered many of my old ones. I have seen places and done things I have come to cherish as moments of true happiness. On the other hand I've had moments of severe discourse, of pain and self-doubt, and worst of all, moments where I came within an inch of that line that is so clearly defined as life, and giving up on all of this. I've seen clarity, and I've made decisions I have come to regret. I'm ending 2009 on a wild card moment. It's really something I didn't expect, but am also taking with strides. Something that panic was attached to, but not directly caused by. Something that will change my life. I welcome 2010 with open arms, and hope it to be as enlightening as 2009.
Also, I turn 20 next month. As I look back over the last decade of my life, I see that I have come a long way, from a lonely little kid who tried just to fit, to being a blooming artist just clawing for survival. I work a job that is more stressful than it should be, I push myself to the limits every day, and I worry about the little things, when the big things don't even phase me. I am no different than I was ten years ago. The difference is a sense of assurance, a feeling that I will overcome if I just keep my head steady and my mind at ease. I feel more alive than ever. I have awoken from a medicated coma, where I was, as eloquently as stated by the band Dredg, a seashell in a sea of shells. And as it follows, I have planted my own seeds, and now as I reap what I have sown, I feel as if I have left that behind. I left the medicines, the doctors, and the criticism behind. This is a turning point in my life, and with that same wild card that I end 2009 on, I end my first 20 years on earth on.
This is where life takes a turn.
This is where I can run and pretend I still fit in within the ruins of my childhood,
Or I can embrace the future, and be the man I need to be to move on.
I could say that I can only hope for this next decade to trump the last,
But I won't.
Instead I will say this.
The future is mine to control. I intend to do exactly that. I intend to be the man I need to be. I intend to move beyond everything I am and everything I have been.
My life is changing. And I will adapt as it does.
Happy New Year, my friends, my enemies, my loves, my past, and my world.
Here's to life, Here's to happiness, and Here's to the Atom Bomb, may we survive our own hatred.
-TBM
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
molle:
never, love!
my pokemon training has taken over my lifee
my pokemon training has taken over my lifee
freakykitty:
happy new year!
