Life has changed so much in these last 6 months. Divorce is closer to reality, though she keeps dragging her feet for some reason. She was the one who wanted to split, now can't seem to get rid of her. Damn!!!
In May I heard from my parents, who I've not communicated with very much for years. My Dad was ill, had been hospitalized twice in a month. I never remember him being in a hospital other than to visit someone else, so that caught me off guard. My Mom has been a diabetic for years, so her health is always a bit fragile. Long story short, combining the divorce which cut a lot of the strings that kept me where I was, and my parents declining health (which would soon have them needing assisted living), we decided that I would move back to their home, along with my younger son. Gave us a lot more security, put 900 miles between me and the ex, gave my parents the help and security they needed to keep the house and live somewhat independently.
It was a great experience to finally see my Dad in ways I never have, and put our differences behind us. Making this peace even more special was the fact that he was sicker than I had realized, or than even my Mom knew. He passed away October 9th, at home with us and his dogs (more important than people, I think, to him) with Hospice helping us out.
Now Mom is in and out of the hospital and a nursing home, hoping to get back home soon. So, being a caregiver is becoming a full time job. Thank goodness my home based business allows that flexibility.
At first the thought of caring for 2 elderly people nearing the end of life was frightening. I had my doubts about bringing a 16 year old kid into the middle of it. It has turned out to be such a great experience for both of us. Death is sad, of course. But it happens to all of us. I am one who sees death as a blessed release when someone has become that ill & frail. The mourning is for those left behind, who must learn to cope with that missing element in their lives.
When I last posted in February, I had no idea where life was leading, and likely wouldn't have believed it if I'd been told. Still waiting for that special someone to come into my life again, but so busy that I'm not sure how I'd handle it. And still waiting for wounds from the past to heal. Not easy when the one who inflicted those wounds seems determined to keep them open and well salted. Yes, I share the blame for what drove us apart, but not for the extended agony she is creating now.
In May I heard from my parents, who I've not communicated with very much for years. My Dad was ill, had been hospitalized twice in a month. I never remember him being in a hospital other than to visit someone else, so that caught me off guard. My Mom has been a diabetic for years, so her health is always a bit fragile. Long story short, combining the divorce which cut a lot of the strings that kept me where I was, and my parents declining health (which would soon have them needing assisted living), we decided that I would move back to their home, along with my younger son. Gave us a lot more security, put 900 miles between me and the ex, gave my parents the help and security they needed to keep the house and live somewhat independently.
It was a great experience to finally see my Dad in ways I never have, and put our differences behind us. Making this peace even more special was the fact that he was sicker than I had realized, or than even my Mom knew. He passed away October 9th, at home with us and his dogs (more important than people, I think, to him) with Hospice helping us out.
Now Mom is in and out of the hospital and a nursing home, hoping to get back home soon. So, being a caregiver is becoming a full time job. Thank goodness my home based business allows that flexibility.
At first the thought of caring for 2 elderly people nearing the end of life was frightening. I had my doubts about bringing a 16 year old kid into the middle of it. It has turned out to be such a great experience for both of us. Death is sad, of course. But it happens to all of us. I am one who sees death as a blessed release when someone has become that ill & frail. The mourning is for those left behind, who must learn to cope with that missing element in their lives.
When I last posted in February, I had no idea where life was leading, and likely wouldn't have believed it if I'd been told. Still waiting for that special someone to come into my life again, but so busy that I'm not sure how I'd handle it. And still waiting for wounds from the past to heal. Not easy when the one who inflicted those wounds seems determined to keep them open and well salted. Yes, I share the blame for what drove us apart, but not for the extended agony she is creating now.