mister_x

i am and always have been my own worst enemy
doubts, fears, and misgivings are reflected and given more power over my mind
there are funhouse mirrors and clouds of smoke
my illusions lead me over the cliff into the real world i have done my best to ignore

it is many things in many forms
the looking glass
the bottle
a drug...
[your] love.

it came back, that old familiar feeling
my own sensory filter giving me over edited and modified information
coming apart
putting it back together
coming apart
putting it back together again
a puzzle without a solution
not a single one
many
infinite

wearing out
spread thin
every touch is precussive
and your touch suddenly feels icy

was it always like this?
or have i finally lost the numbness
only to want it back so badly

nothing is ever truly appreciated untill it is lost forever
nothing
remember that
if you ever remember anything
enjoy every second you have

reality check me
right into the boards

getting is passe
wanting is a sin
giving is what i had intended to do







fino a che non amiamo ancora. .... ...
your caliginous peregrinator,

-x

p.s. yes, and it fucking hurrts like hell but all the drugs i took make it go away. at least for a little while.