Part Deux:
Friday night I just fucked around and did nothing of note. Saturday however I woke up and chose to pay homage to the late great Emperor Joshua Norton I.
Step 1: The bridge. The bay bridge allows travelers to quickly ride from San Francisco to Oakland. This $77 million (depression dollars mind you) idea was commissioned by our illustrious late Emperor, but construction had not started until after he had passed away. Stillhe thunk it first. The bridge opened in 1936 and last I heard is scheduled to be demolished sometime in 2007, so I felt a pressing need to capture the Emperors most expensive legacy.
Step 2: His grave. Dun Dun Duuuuuuuuuhhhhn. I walked about two thousand miles to get on San Franciscos subway system.The Bart. When I got on Bart the sky was a radiant blue and there wasnt a cloud in the sky. As I got closer to the graveyard the weather became increasingly more depressing and morbid.
Finally I arrived in Colma, the city that houses the cemetery. I was worried the cab driver I found would have to wait an hour while I walked around like a jack ass trying to find the right grave. Through some weird miracle the Bart station was only something like four blocks from the cemetery. Whoop!! I got a map from a guy in the office that bore no resemblance to reality and walked the massive graveyard for something like an hour trying to find the elusive bastard.
There he is!!! I was so excited. I sat there for awhile, took some pictures, and eventually decided something needed to be said or done before I left. I did what any goddess fearing Discordian would do in my situation: I robbed his grave. Before you get indignant let me point out that Emperor Norton was not actually using it at the time, and the previous owner would almost certainly be cool with the situation.
Much to my surprise there was another tombstone for Jos Sarria who claimed to be his Empress. I had never heard of Jose and was under the impression that his wife died before he became Emperor and left him a widower without heirs. I was confused at the time but the glories of the internet have cleared that little confusion away like a paper towel wiping cum off a whores ass.
Then I walked back to the train, rode it back to a beautiful sunny San Francisco, and laid down for several hours resting before I had to get ready for Prom.
Friday night I just fucked around and did nothing of note. Saturday however I woke up and chose to pay homage to the late great Emperor Joshua Norton I.
Step 1: The bridge. The bay bridge allows travelers to quickly ride from San Francisco to Oakland. This $77 million (depression dollars mind you) idea was commissioned by our illustrious late Emperor, but construction had not started until after he had passed away. Stillhe thunk it first. The bridge opened in 1936 and last I heard is scheduled to be demolished sometime in 2007, so I felt a pressing need to capture the Emperors most expensive legacy.
Step 2: His grave. Dun Dun Duuuuuuuuuhhhhn. I walked about two thousand miles to get on San Franciscos subway system.The Bart. When I got on Bart the sky was a radiant blue and there wasnt a cloud in the sky. As I got closer to the graveyard the weather became increasingly more depressing and morbid.
Finally I arrived in Colma, the city that houses the cemetery. I was worried the cab driver I found would have to wait an hour while I walked around like a jack ass trying to find the right grave. Through some weird miracle the Bart station was only something like four blocks from the cemetery. Whoop!! I got a map from a guy in the office that bore no resemblance to reality and walked the massive graveyard for something like an hour trying to find the elusive bastard.
There he is!!! I was so excited. I sat there for awhile, took some pictures, and eventually decided something needed to be said or done before I left. I did what any goddess fearing Discordian would do in my situation: I robbed his grave. Before you get indignant let me point out that Emperor Norton was not actually using it at the time, and the previous owner would almost certainly be cool with the situation.
Much to my surprise there was another tombstone for Jos Sarria who claimed to be his Empress. I had never heard of Jose and was under the impression that his wife died before he became Emperor and left him a widower without heirs. I was confused at the time but the glories of the internet have cleared that little confusion away like a paper towel wiping cum off a whores ass.
Then I walked back to the train, rode it back to a beautiful sunny San Francisco, and laid down for several hours resting before I had to get ready for Prom.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
vixen:
You went to Prom? How was it?
lemonkid:
Fuck Brad. Her and me.