If you're not looking for someone they won't come either.
Hmm is that some kind of reverse-synchronicity type thing?
Getting back on track, I agree that you need to be defined by more than your job. TBH I think a person is best represented by a) the friends that they make and b) the art that they create. Never been to NY so can't comment much there, although I'd love to check it out even though (apparently) it's gone downhill some...