jennynicole

So... apparently I've been too lazy to update lately. Anyways.. don't think people read it much. Well.. things are ok. I think after nine months things are finally leveling out. Super depressed and then super happy.. and now maybe i'm just in the middle. I really don't know, and I try not to think about it too much. I try to just live life, do some fun stuff when I can afford to and that's about it. Thinking depresses me, so I try not to do it too often. Just a general statement here.. but I think the thing that I hate most about depression, is that it makes everyone around me so edgy/sad/worried/aggrivated/annoyed... or something like that. On my own, I can deal with it.. its mellow, unchanging.. dependable. But like I said.. people get pissed when I say stuff like that. Hence, the xanga doesn't get updated much and I try to stear clear of deep conversations. For those of you that actually read this.. I'm still here, I'm still me, I'm just trying to put others before me for a change. I mean, yes.. in ways I am still that same selfish ole bitch, lol. But it doesn't help anyone when I talk about anything sad, so I just.. dont. Maybe I'm just learning that its simply not worth it to worry about the problems of myself and the world that I know there is no answer to, no solution I can come up with, no magical power that can make it all better. Life is what it is, and quite frankly today.. I just don't see why people make such a big deal out of it. I guess that was kinda depressing of me to say, but I'm not forcing you to read it.. simply venting and you can choose to do what you like about it.

That's all for now.... l8er