Euuurrrrggghhhhh....
It's sort of a belligerent sigh. I don't seem to really "get drunk" anymore. I get sick before I get drunk. I get to this point where I'm sort of numb but not to the point where I used to be stumbly or lacking in vision. I usually get sick before I get drunk because.. well right now I'm just sick so I suppose I can be excused. I downed some Panadol's which tided me over (is tided a word? it seems wrong). I'm not sure if painkillers and alcohol are intended to be take together but.. I've had a headache and a sore back for days and I didn't want to be hindered tonight.
My friend Todd is moving to Brisbane on Wednesday. I've more or less been best friends with him since we were 13. From the strange relationship we had in year 8 maths where he'd try to copy my work and I'd cover it up with my arm and tell him he wouldn't learn anything if he just stole my answers. Up through sleepovers and sporting teams and trips and living together and playing music with him for the past 9 years. Tonight was his "going away drinks". I got the night off work for it.
There's this place called the Watermark, which is an upscale sort of bar and restaurant on the beach, which has super expensive apartments above it. It confuses me as it has a wide cross-section of people who frequent the place. It looks like it should be very high class, and yet, being on the beach and having 2 for 1 drinks between 5 and 7 on a Friday, there are a lot of people in thongs and board shorts and caps. But I don't even think that's because they've just spent a day at the beach. I think it's just because Townsville is full of shitbags who don't particularly value their appearance or care about dressing nicely. Call me an asshole but I found myself being pretty gay and saying things in my head like "as if wear THAT out, ewwww".
But I'm at a point where.. I thought like I was overdressed.. or rather that everyone else was underdressed. That maybe I'm just overdressed for this city. If you can call it a city at all. I've had too many run-ins with people who are so afraid of something different that they shun it and try to destroy it. I can handle being called names when people are driving past in cars or walking in the opposite direction because that way they can have an escape route just in case this menacing/skinny/5'8" man-beast in skinny jeans and a tie decide that their behaviour was uncouth and that they should perhaps apologise for their unkind words or suffer some dire consequences involving physical pain. But I don't even feel safe as I've been attacked before without even looking at someone, let alone speaking to them, or affecting their life in any meaningful way. No one has a grudge against me, they just have a grudge against what they decide is different to them.
They all look the same.
Not that I'm saying that if I were to move somewhere different, I wouldn't be their equivalent, in being somewhere that has more of a percentage of people that share similar interests. Maybe I'd be the majority and I'd be the one calling other people out. I'd like to think that it's not a lifestyle choice but a personal choice to act like a fuckhead to others. Because, you know, not two paragraphs ago I was teasing about why people would wear certain things to such venues. I'm probably not any different anyway.
But maybe I'll move anyway.
I like kisses and cuddles and holding hands more than I like sex. And I don't want it to be just for tonight.. I want it for tomorrow too.
It's sort of a belligerent sigh. I don't seem to really "get drunk" anymore. I get sick before I get drunk. I get to this point where I'm sort of numb but not to the point where I used to be stumbly or lacking in vision. I usually get sick before I get drunk because.. well right now I'm just sick so I suppose I can be excused. I downed some Panadol's which tided me over (is tided a word? it seems wrong). I'm not sure if painkillers and alcohol are intended to be take together but.. I've had a headache and a sore back for days and I didn't want to be hindered tonight.
My friend Todd is moving to Brisbane on Wednesday. I've more or less been best friends with him since we were 13. From the strange relationship we had in year 8 maths where he'd try to copy my work and I'd cover it up with my arm and tell him he wouldn't learn anything if he just stole my answers. Up through sleepovers and sporting teams and trips and living together and playing music with him for the past 9 years. Tonight was his "going away drinks". I got the night off work for it.
There's this place called the Watermark, which is an upscale sort of bar and restaurant on the beach, which has super expensive apartments above it. It confuses me as it has a wide cross-section of people who frequent the place. It looks like it should be very high class, and yet, being on the beach and having 2 for 1 drinks between 5 and 7 on a Friday, there are a lot of people in thongs and board shorts and caps. But I don't even think that's because they've just spent a day at the beach. I think it's just because Townsville is full of shitbags who don't particularly value their appearance or care about dressing nicely. Call me an asshole but I found myself being pretty gay and saying things in my head like "as if wear THAT out, ewwww".
But I'm at a point where.. I thought like I was overdressed.. or rather that everyone else was underdressed. That maybe I'm just overdressed for this city. If you can call it a city at all. I've had too many run-ins with people who are so afraid of something different that they shun it and try to destroy it. I can handle being called names when people are driving past in cars or walking in the opposite direction because that way they can have an escape route just in case this menacing/skinny/5'8" man-beast in skinny jeans and a tie decide that their behaviour was uncouth and that they should perhaps apologise for their unkind words or suffer some dire consequences involving physical pain. But I don't even feel safe as I've been attacked before without even looking at someone, let alone speaking to them, or affecting their life in any meaningful way. No one has a grudge against me, they just have a grudge against what they decide is different to them.
They all look the same.
Not that I'm saying that if I were to move somewhere different, I wouldn't be their equivalent, in being somewhere that has more of a percentage of people that share similar interests. Maybe I'd be the majority and I'd be the one calling other people out. I'd like to think that it's not a lifestyle choice but a personal choice to act like a fuckhead to others. Because, you know, not two paragraphs ago I was teasing about why people would wear certain things to such venues. I'm probably not any different anyway.
But maybe I'll move anyway.
I like kisses and cuddles and holding hands more than I like sex. And I don't want it to be just for tonight.. I want it for tomorrow too.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
anyways... i say move to westbrook, maine. haha youre not overdressed for here... and ill cuddle with you.
i used to look like my older sister and we are only 10 months apart. acording to my mum.. i was a surprise not an accident..
anyway... people always mistook us for identical twins. i guess thats why i had a lot of boyfriends dump me for her..
oh well..
i went blonde a few weeks ago and my little sister was like.. wow you look like me now..and thats a realy good thing!
righto......
i love that kid.
thats sad to hear about your friend todd moving away from you.
will you be visiting him when you come to brisbane..
p.s. because i dont have anyone worth cuddling me in my life.. i bought one of those body length pillows. so good. they dont snore or fart in bed or wake u up with a hard on poking you in the back.