Problems at home.
I think the biggest issue I have with living at home is the complete lack of respect my father has for me as maturing adult. Sure maybe I'm an really an "adult" yet. But I'm certainly to the point where you should have enough respect to not go into my room and remove my DVD player that I purchased with MY OWN MONEY without asking, especially when there is a completely working DVD player in the basement (WHICH I ALSO BOUGHT) being unused because there isn't room for it or enough cable jacks. And when I confront him about it he's like "Sorry I would have left a note but there wasn't any surface area to leave a note". Well if my room is dirty or organized should be your concern, it should be respecting what is mine. And I'm sure your reply is "Why are you making a big deal out of the fact your dad took your DVD player when there is another one?". Because kids, I'm a nice person and I would have said yes and I wouldn't have gotten mad if he didn't act like it was his god given fucking right to just take whatever he wants as he pleases.
I've never been able to earn his respect. In 11th grade I was in honors gifted classes and workd 2 jobs, and was active in after school activities...and he did not care. He never came to my awards ceremonies for Capstone, he made me cry on my own graduation for spending to much time hugging my friends. I've had to lone out money time and time again to my mother to pay taxes and bills because he doesn't have a real job. Right now my mom owes me almost two grand because he doesn't create enough income. I shouldn't have to time and time again dig into my savings to cover his mistakes. He told me once that he would do anything to see me go to a good college and succeed in whatever I want to do, but does he? No.
I understand with time and age comes more repsonsibilities that I will have to take care of, but under the circumstances sometimes I find it overwhelmingly impossible. Because my dad refuses to work for a normal company with health benefits rather then sitting at home all day and selling books online I'm forced to myself go on what is considered "welfare" so that I can have health insurence. But to keep my health insurence, I can't make more then $530 dollars a month. It's very difficult at a 20 year old to live on that kind of income. I spend atleast $100 on gas every month. I pay for my own food during the day, entertainment, gym membership, and I'm still trying to save. It all just feels impossible sometimes. And I feel so alone because of it. Because I can't ask any family for help and I know my parents can't help.
I don't know why I even bothered writing this.
P.S.
I'm missing him.
I think the biggest issue I have with living at home is the complete lack of respect my father has for me as maturing adult. Sure maybe I'm an really an "adult" yet. But I'm certainly to the point where you should have enough respect to not go into my room and remove my DVD player that I purchased with MY OWN MONEY without asking, especially when there is a completely working DVD player in the basement (WHICH I ALSO BOUGHT) being unused because there isn't room for it or enough cable jacks. And when I confront him about it he's like "Sorry I would have left a note but there wasn't any surface area to leave a note". Well if my room is dirty or organized should be your concern, it should be respecting what is mine. And I'm sure your reply is "Why are you making a big deal out of the fact your dad took your DVD player when there is another one?". Because kids, I'm a nice person and I would have said yes and I wouldn't have gotten mad if he didn't act like it was his god given fucking right to just take whatever he wants as he pleases.
I've never been able to earn his respect. In 11th grade I was in honors gifted classes and workd 2 jobs, and was active in after school activities...and he did not care. He never came to my awards ceremonies for Capstone, he made me cry on my own graduation for spending to much time hugging my friends. I've had to lone out money time and time again to my mother to pay taxes and bills because he doesn't have a real job. Right now my mom owes me almost two grand because he doesn't create enough income. I shouldn't have to time and time again dig into my savings to cover his mistakes. He told me once that he would do anything to see me go to a good college and succeed in whatever I want to do, but does he? No.
I understand with time and age comes more repsonsibilities that I will have to take care of, but under the circumstances sometimes I find it overwhelmingly impossible. Because my dad refuses to work for a normal company with health benefits rather then sitting at home all day and selling books online I'm forced to myself go on what is considered "welfare" so that I can have health insurence. But to keep my health insurence, I can't make more then $530 dollars a month. It's very difficult at a 20 year old to live on that kind of income. I spend atleast $100 on gas every month. I pay for my own food during the day, entertainment, gym membership, and I'm still trying to save. It all just feels impossible sometimes. And I feel so alone because of it. Because I can't ask any family for help and I know my parents can't help.
I don't know why I even bothered writing this.
P.S.
I'm missing him.