girltrouble

So... it's been a few days... and it will most likely be a few more. Not because I'm lazy, or depressed, or even any more busy than before. I've found myself in a new place lately and I'm still figuring out how my life fits within it. I guess this is what I've been working for years to arrive at. What I've payed therapists thousands of dollars to help me achieve. And now I'm in this weird place. Kind of like the time after a death where you look around and it feels like the whole world has changed but everything looks the same and no one else even seems to notice.

Things still aren't perfect. I still haven't completely gotten the hang of this whole living, breathing, feeling thing. When my husband and I fight I'm more likely to want to beat him then than let it hurt me. But at least I'm feeling something, which hasn't happened in years. It's renewed my passion in all things, good and bad.

Now what to do with it. I'm still working on that. But I see a lot of things changing and my time with SG may be one of them. I'm not sure when or how or what else is going to change. The changes seem to just be evolving without a lot of effort on my part so I just don't know.

I think I may be being completely vague here but I'm not meaning to be. If you're wondering what the fuck I'm talking about just e-mail me. I'm not saying I'm leaving SG today, you just may hear from me less and I don't want to leave you all feeling like I just disappeared so I'm mentioning this now.


And now a complete change of subject. A thought for you to ponder.

If the likelyhood for people to use birth control and have fewer children increases the more educated a person is... doesn't that mean the population will get dumber over time?