I would honestly give up on her..its a waste of time to love someone who will not love you in return..thats just what I think..and yea snow days are great..especally when you live 20 mins out of town

that does not mean you are a fraud if you "give up on her".
you can still love her and want whats best for her without continuing to be consumed by it.

i know....i have two exes that i still love dearly and had wanted friendships with. i too want them to be happy, i know that wouldn't have happened with me.

but, they just seemed to need to move on from me. it was hard, but i had to just accept it and let it go, it was eating me up.

Dreams are not always kind. In fact, they can be cruel. But whether they can lie? That is up to you to decide.

I am reading a book right now. As Meat Loves Salt by Maria McCann, and there is a line that your post reminded me of: "[The Devil] rode me hard, driving in spurs. I had a pain all along my breastbone and I thought of the words 'broken heart'." Ah, but we all know that pain: the drop in the belly, the fall down the deep well of the soul. The terrible truth is that most all rise back up, surfacing to try again at love. But do not kid yourself. You are not the same. She has scarred you. But scars do wear into character. Welcome to the the Real; She's a bitch. [ Remember also that wounds must heal into scars, and they cannot heal if you keep them open and bleeding all the time. oh, the unsolicited love advice]

And as a good pagan you might want to work a little magick on your behalf. A cleansing, a cutting..whatever works for you. You might also want to offer something to an appropriate god/dess to curry their favor in your pursuit of the terrible ways of love.

ah, and I forgot to ask what you thought of the dark pagan articles, etc . It was so eclipsed by your heartache...

I hate mylife... i wish it would end.