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frantic

United Kingdom

Member Since 2005

Followers 81 Following 587

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Friday Jul 22, 2005

Jul 22, 2005
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Ok wrote it, Its short and went down a road i wasn't expecting.

Pathetic

Dont look at me your already dead
I feel your heartless stare pass through me
Your my past why there wont you stay?
Instead you come back and continue to treat me this way
Your touch that once was so soft is now decayed
Your mind is dirt your words all lies
Body self abused your warmth turned to ice
I believed you were the one
Left to draw my blood whist you had fun
Hate in me you created
My eyes burn like fire
How I hate you, The pathetic sick little liar.



So what to do? The girl that broke my heart is coming back to work (now a teenage mum-not mine) I was told she had been sacked because of her constant no showing for work all the time, but no managers lied. She somehow managed get away with it and get maternity pay, little slut always got what she wanted. Trouble is for me now is that where as before she made me cry now she makes me angry. As i sit here writing this i know i wont care and just get on with my job. But i also know that there is this stupid part in me that will react to her, i hope that part is gone but it hasnt been tested while shes been away for 7 months. Also im growing fed up of things around me. Im losing faith in a lot of friends i thought i had and im growing cold to everything, only sam is getting my heart to register anything and at this rate it'll put a strain on us too. I feel like ive hit a point in my life where nothing is what it seems, Nothing is real and i feel a massive change will-has to happen in my life. I do care a lot about friends and family and this has become my weekness. When my ex hurt me so badly (over 8 months of mind games etc) I learned to shut off from people that hurt me in any way. And this has got to a point now where the simplest things are pushing me away from everyone. I dont wanna be alone i dont wanna be cold, but i dont wanna feel like this either, I guess i need some soul searching time. Sorry this isnt too cheery ill try better next time.


"when all of your wishes have been granted many of your dreams will be destroyed" M M.
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
goblintcat:
That sounds pretty funny! Nothing wrong with having people think you're ma!
Jul 24, 2005
starlitesxpress:
One bit of advice: The girl at work.....Look at her and look at you: your excelling shes not.HA!
You have a lovely girl to support you dont fuck it up!
YOu have goals and dreams follow them!


and yeh antibiotics is crap!!!!!!! kiss
Jul 24, 2005

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