Sunday Oct 31, 2004

0
*twitch*
Last night
was hard.
Why did I do it
My form of
Self destruction.
My questions.

*twitch*

I met Her once before
She did not seem to
Like me at all.
In a splice of time
I used to be happy
for Him and Her
together.

I read Her log.
I'm sorry

*twitch*

Pondering hurts.
Sometimes
I think I could be capable
of murder.
When my blood runs cold
and my veins are shred
with emotion,
I think I could.
I could.

*twitch*

But I'm not angry
And I'm not upset.
I did not cry
But the pondering
the wandering
has broken me.

Do i measure up
Did His touch translate
the same way
Are Her and I the same person
over and over
Meaningful but gone

*twitch*

And the pictures
Does He seem happier
Is His smile something
that only I can see.

Why do I need
this affirmation
of how I make Him feel
If I make Him happy.

I don't want to be Her

*twitch*

I'm sorry.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
zanafar:
I hope I understood this right(if I totally have the wrong idea, then please forgive me on this) but it seems to me that you are comparing yourself to your bf's ex. If your bf is with you and not her, then he surely must care for you more. After all, you yourself were talking about learning from past relationships, so if he isn't with her, there must be some negative qualitys that she has and you don't and good qualitys you have that she didn't that he enjoys.
I hope this made sence (if it didn't, just pretend I said something truly knowledgable, then just smile and nod)

(I really hope I understood your entree right! If not, then I probaly sound pretty stupid right here!)

[Edited on Oct 31, 2004 9:39PM]
karismic:
hello. i see your from calgary! biggrin

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