Two days ago, my boyfriend and I just broke up. Today, I'm a mess. I think it was the good decision, for both of us, but after a five years relationship whith my first love, I have to learn to live without him, and without our love. It hurts, and I have to say I'm affraid.
I don't think it was something easy. We still love each other, but it was too painful. We both make mistakes, and I have to let him go and move on.
This is probably the most difficult thing I have to make. Give up all the plans we made together, think that I will have to give up this love, even if he will always be someone very special and very important to me.
It might seems weird, but he really help me with all this crap. I really feel like if, after all the pain and the mistakes, we could really become better as friend than couple. I'm not saying it would be easy, but I really want to make it possible.
This boy will always be a part of me. Today, when I think about this part, it hurts and I still cry, wondering how we could have saved our love. But I'm pretty sure that one day, in weeks, in months, I would only remember all the greastest moments, all the magical things we have. I really hope that one day, all the pain would be gone.
I have to focus on the exciting part of the situation. Maybe we met each others too young, and I've never known anything else than him. Maybe it is time to think about me, what I want, what I need,... anything could happen and even if the pain will be there for a while, it's time for a new part of my life. And I have to admitt I pretty excited about it.
But whatever that could ever happen, I kown he will always be the first for me, the one with the special place in my heart, and even if one day, I fall in love wih someone else, I would always love him. Today, I just want to move on, find myself again, and I really want him to be a part of it, even if it would never be as a lover again.
I'm not mad about what happened. I think it was the only way for us to broke up without hate. We can stay in each other life, and be very close. I'm just sad that we have to suffer so much about this relationship. No one could ever take that away from me, we were madly in love, it was true.
And who knows waht could ever happen again between us, when we would have find ourselves.
I know I would never lose hope in love...
This is the picture I will keep of us : love, despite everything, love always
I don't think it was something easy. We still love each other, but it was too painful. We both make mistakes, and I have to let him go and move on.
This is probably the most difficult thing I have to make. Give up all the plans we made together, think that I will have to give up this love, even if he will always be someone very special and very important to me.
It might seems weird, but he really help me with all this crap. I really feel like if, after all the pain and the mistakes, we could really become better as friend than couple. I'm not saying it would be easy, but I really want to make it possible.
This boy will always be a part of me. Today, when I think about this part, it hurts and I still cry, wondering how we could have saved our love. But I'm pretty sure that one day, in weeks, in months, I would only remember all the greastest moments, all the magical things we have. I really hope that one day, all the pain would be gone.
I have to focus on the exciting part of the situation. Maybe we met each others too young, and I've never known anything else than him. Maybe it is time to think about me, what I want, what I need,... anything could happen and even if the pain will be there for a while, it's time for a new part of my life. And I have to admitt I pretty excited about it.
But whatever that could ever happen, I kown he will always be the first for me, the one with the special place in my heart, and even if one day, I fall in love wih someone else, I would always love him. Today, I just want to move on, find myself again, and I really want him to be a part of it, even if it would never be as a lover again.
I'm not mad about what happened. I think it was the only way for us to broke up without hate. We can stay in each other life, and be very close. I'm just sad that we have to suffer so much about this relationship. No one could ever take that away from me, we were madly in love, it was true.
And who knows waht could ever happen again between us, when we would have find ourselves.
I know I would never lose hope in love...
This is the picture I will keep of us : love, despite everything, love always
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
pointman11:
It is always sad to read about breakups and love, I have had my share of both, but you seem to have a tremendous grasp of yourself and a beautuiful outlook on the outcome. I commend you on such an approach. I sincerly hopethat you heal and find yourself and become infinatly happy. Who knows? As you both grow and can stay friends, it doesnt mean that you two cant rekindle later down the road. I wish you all the best
fanette:
Thanks a lot for that.