And if you're Jocelyn Logan, they will likely be a douchebag...one that writes WIZARD on your hand in perfect typeset and asks for you to buy them a drink. That's a pretty high price to pay for some eye candy and a laugh or two.

Unless you are a guy at the bar by yourself....in which case everyone (even those who know you casually) will avoid you like the spanish inquisition.

ok, I'm an uber dork...rember how we were talking about nintendo controllers vs. pistols on hips as tattoos? check this shit out, I am the ultimate dork....
LARYNGOSCOPES...theyre the pistols of the vet profession

yeah...apparently guns have become teh haute-ness of the emo-circuit...

I don't get it. Ok, well I get it, I just hate to see the ever-expanding bandwagon.

I hope that you girls are uber-dorks enough to spit on this dopey trend.

Guns are icky.

Who the fuck are you?

Eve, Have I told you lately that I love you? In addtion I hate Rod Stewart, but am reduced to using the cheesy song lyrics that pop into my head. It's probably because I'm so negative

Apparently my negativity killed Steve Irwin! It spanned 9984 miles, reached a stingray, and holy fuck, the sting ray felt the vibe and went apeshit on Steve Irwin. I realllly need to be more negative more often if this is what happens. Now for some select people at work...

Oh, and a day at work without you, sucks massive balls. Hairy and stanky too. Not the hot Indian kind.

Mmm...hot indians. Indian women are Bollywood's ONLY saving grace. Unless the movie has "Sutra" in the title.