elliesmell

so, for a while there it seemed like everything was pretty good but it turns out a week can make such a difference. and everything is pretty shit again.

this is a list of events in chronological order since my last update
-brother stole money
-parents threw me out of the house
-sister stoppped talking to me
-a guy i had gone with a few times at uni asked me out, i told him we'd talk about it in the morning when we were sober, he took it badly
-realised i am well on my way to complete bankruptcy
-saw the uni financial advisor, i can apply for the student support fund, which helps students in financial hardship (with over 3,000 debts i think i am entitled) and which i never have to pay back
-mum phoned me and told me i could come home
-guy i liked asked me out again when i explained that i did actually like him and wasnt giving him the brush off last time
-had a really awesome weekend where nothing could go wrong
-arrived back at uni on sunday
-dumped on tuesday (commitment issues)
-another friend who im really close to kissed me, then told me he didnt want to fuck me over, so we could only be friends, but he loves me more than i can imagine (frustration)
-mums been opening my bank statements, im in the shithouse again
-mum wants me to drop out of uni and get a full time job, theres just over 2 months left this semester, and i can get a full time job during the summer, so she can go fuck herself if she thinks im throwing away my future because i owe her some money and she cant understand if i were to start paying her back i'd just end up having to borrow the money again because whatever i get paid pays for travel to and from uni and work, groceries (and the odd night out)

so basically, everything is back to shit pretty much. except i realised this week who my close friends really were, i fell in love with a few of my friends this week, i am so lucky to have some of them. jamie and catherine bought me a fish, i named him dr frank'n'furter, he will always love me and never die.