as my brain crack-a-lack-les fizzy whirring braindead sounds, i thought it would be the opportune time to update. i've been writing much more in my personal journals.
i'm in my studio drinking my first cup of coffee since....i don't even know. i'm more of the energy-drink kind of girl, cause coffee hurts my stomach lining. i got off work way early, leaving me time to catch up on the work i managed to not get done this weekend....but i have lost all understanding of time. it's been quite surreal. I've been known to be fashionably late all my life, it's sort of a miami-thing, but i've been falling asleep on myself lately, zoning out and such, coming back a half-hour later wondering wtf just happened.
i may not sleep much in the next two days, which i've been trying to make a priority (omg, the boy left me in his nice big bed on friday when he went to work, and i had planned to get up and do stuff, but ended up sleeping till late afternoon, and i had forgotten how wonderful it feels to be well rested and remember multiple dreams...) but!!!! after that, there will be glorious, glorious nothingness- no obligations!! (maybe a couple minor ones). i might sleep for a week, to make up for the past.....oh, two months..or year.... then i go home on the 20th. The boy comes to visit for new years for a few days. i return jan. 11th. aaaand start my last semester. The beginning of an end...(ie, of my time in baltimore).
it's not time to think about what happens after that, yet. I still need to get through today and tomorrow.
It's kind of cute how you can count on me to be consistent in the most peculiar instances. Like, i will always, for example, have a nervous breakdown in front of one of my teachers during finals. I was sent home to bed on monday. in a most maternal way. i'm not worried about passing my classes, but there is a perfectionistic side of me that nostalgically remembers the girl who graduated in the top ten of her class with a 4.0 +, with all sorts of honors, while working at her afterschool job 3 days a week...ah, but the pressures to perform in such ways were intense, and i was pretty fuckin miserable.
All of this disorganization-ness is changing; i'm going through a very transformational phase, and a book called 'Organizing for the Creative Person' has become my bible. These authors know everything about my right-brain dominant self,give me suggestions about how to live in a left-brain world, and i don't even have to pray to them, or anything!!!
see, see, look at me scheduling things in my little black book of a day-planner!!!:
right, okay, speaking of which... i really need to get back to work now.
i'm in my studio drinking my first cup of coffee since....i don't even know. i'm more of the energy-drink kind of girl, cause coffee hurts my stomach lining. i got off work way early, leaving me time to catch up on the work i managed to not get done this weekend....but i have lost all understanding of time. it's been quite surreal. I've been known to be fashionably late all my life, it's sort of a miami-thing, but i've been falling asleep on myself lately, zoning out and such, coming back a half-hour later wondering wtf just happened.
i may not sleep much in the next two days, which i've been trying to make a priority (omg, the boy left me in his nice big bed on friday when he went to work, and i had planned to get up and do stuff, but ended up sleeping till late afternoon, and i had forgotten how wonderful it feels to be well rested and remember multiple dreams...) but!!!! after that, there will be glorious, glorious nothingness- no obligations!! (maybe a couple minor ones). i might sleep for a week, to make up for the past.....oh, two months..or year.... then i go home on the 20th. The boy comes to visit for new years for a few days. i return jan. 11th. aaaand start my last semester. The beginning of an end...(ie, of my time in baltimore).
it's not time to think about what happens after that, yet. I still need to get through today and tomorrow.
It's kind of cute how you can count on me to be consistent in the most peculiar instances. Like, i will always, for example, have a nervous breakdown in front of one of my teachers during finals. I was sent home to bed on monday. in a most maternal way. i'm not worried about passing my classes, but there is a perfectionistic side of me that nostalgically remembers the girl who graduated in the top ten of her class with a 4.0 +, with all sorts of honors, while working at her afterschool job 3 days a week...ah, but the pressures to perform in such ways were intense, and i was pretty fuckin miserable.
All of this disorganization-ness is changing; i'm going through a very transformational phase, and a book called 'Organizing for the Creative Person' has become my bible. These authors know everything about my right-brain dominant self,give me suggestions about how to live in a left-brain world, and i don't even have to pray to them, or anything!!!
see, see, look at me scheduling things in my little black book of a day-planner!!!:
right, okay, speaking of which... i really need to get back to work now.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
arkane:
Come down this saturday!!!
jabroni:
May the force be with you, young Jedi! 