I've been updating tid bits in my profile....you should look...they're funny....
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Had an old hunch back dude almost banging down the fucking door to the store this morning. I was like DUDE! We open at 10! Read the sign bitch. He's all got his hands cupped around his eyes peering in...as if...if he spots me looking at him, I'm gonna rush over and let him in early and appologize for not opening before 10, and before the store's actually ready to open.
He takes a walk around the entire store, and a minute later, comes to the counter with one of the biggest penis pumps we have.
I can't imagine how shitty your life must be if all you can think of to do is get to the porn store as fast as you fucking can bright and early to get your penis pump and head home and stick your dick in a tube.
When is there ever a rush to stick your dick in a tube?
Like...if I had a dick...I'd want to take my time sticking my dick in a tube. Guys? Am I right?
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My baby left for a working-vacation in Seattle just now.
He's going over for 5 days to study with the top illustrators in the country. I'm excited for him...he never gets to paint anymore...but it's just gonna wear him out. I know it. He does too damn much. I wish I could just hold him hostage at my house for a week and rub his back, cook him nice meals, and make him relax. Damn it. And of course....get my 'fill' of him.
It's weird. My boss's boyfriend is gone right now...mine left today...and my other good friend's boy is gone too...
I think there's some greater collective boyfriend unconscious out there stealing our men from us for a week.
That fuckin' blows.
P.S. If you're in Richmond...come by Taboo we're having a 15% off anything that vibrates sale in honor of my boss's boyfriend being gone.
So if you need a Jack Rabbit or a vibrating pussy pocket...cum on out!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Saw the Raveonettes Saturday.
They were fucking AMAZING!!
The Sweeds make beautiful women I must say....
Almost punched a really fucking abnoxious homo in the face. He kept jumpin' around and almost elbowing my friend Kori in the face, so the man and I told him if he didn't stop, we'd break his nose. Then he called me a cunt. Then I pushed him. He kinda cut it out after that. He and his homo boyfriend kept trying to lean over the stage to get the guitarist to sign some scrap of fucking paper....during the performance. Like, the dude's gonna put down his guitar just so he can sign your beer soaked bar napkin. You can see why this ass needed a fist to the face. My friend Kori wanted to follow them out to their car and beat the tar out of them....but...we decided to buy stuff at the merch table instead.
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I get to hang out with Cheap Trick tomorrow night at Innsbrook. My good friend that I spoke of before (who's bf is also gone now) has already gotten us quite a few free beer tickets. We may need a DD. Or, we'll just have Cheap Trick's limo take us back home.
Saawhheeeeeeeeeeeeettttt!
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Had dinner with the mom & pops Sunday eve. They were very well behaved. Well...until my dad got drunk on red wine and my mom started talking politics.
That's always my cue to leave.
But I did take out my tounge ring "for them" at the dinner table. My mom was grossed completely out. But she was astonished. (For those of you who don't read my journal regularly...the dentist told me my gums were receeding b/f of the bar, so I had to take it out...but my parents don't know that...so I pretended it was in 'thanks' for buying me the car.)
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This weekend is the shitty bachelorette party that I have to go to.
I have to make a 2 layer penis cake for the event. And bring retarded 'bachelorette party drinking games' and stupid 'bride veil with penis's on them'.....grrrrr..r....r.r.r.........
Fucking wedding.
God damn pain in my checkbook.
But...at least I know my car won't break down out in the middle of nowhere on the way!!!!
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Had an old hunch back dude almost banging down the fucking door to the store this morning. I was like DUDE! We open at 10! Read the sign bitch. He's all got his hands cupped around his eyes peering in...as if...if he spots me looking at him, I'm gonna rush over and let him in early and appologize for not opening before 10, and before the store's actually ready to open.
He takes a walk around the entire store, and a minute later, comes to the counter with one of the biggest penis pumps we have.
I can't imagine how shitty your life must be if all you can think of to do is get to the porn store as fast as you fucking can bright and early to get your penis pump and head home and stick your dick in a tube.
When is there ever a rush to stick your dick in a tube?
Like...if I had a dick...I'd want to take my time sticking my dick in a tube. Guys? Am I right?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
My baby left for a working-vacation in Seattle just now.
He's going over for 5 days to study with the top illustrators in the country. I'm excited for him...he never gets to paint anymore...but it's just gonna wear him out. I know it. He does too damn much. I wish I could just hold him hostage at my house for a week and rub his back, cook him nice meals, and make him relax. Damn it. And of course....get my 'fill' of him.
It's weird. My boss's boyfriend is gone right now...mine left today...and my other good friend's boy is gone too...
I think there's some greater collective boyfriend unconscious out there stealing our men from us for a week.
That fuckin' blows.
P.S. If you're in Richmond...come by Taboo we're having a 15% off anything that vibrates sale in honor of my boss's boyfriend being gone.
So if you need a Jack Rabbit or a vibrating pussy pocket...cum on out!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Saw the Raveonettes Saturday.
They were fucking AMAZING!!
The Sweeds make beautiful women I must say....
Almost punched a really fucking abnoxious homo in the face. He kept jumpin' around and almost elbowing my friend Kori in the face, so the man and I told him if he didn't stop, we'd break his nose. Then he called me a cunt. Then I pushed him. He kinda cut it out after that. He and his homo boyfriend kept trying to lean over the stage to get the guitarist to sign some scrap of fucking paper....during the performance. Like, the dude's gonna put down his guitar just so he can sign your beer soaked bar napkin. You can see why this ass needed a fist to the face. My friend Kori wanted to follow them out to their car and beat the tar out of them....but...we decided to buy stuff at the merch table instead.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
I get to hang out with Cheap Trick tomorrow night at Innsbrook. My good friend that I spoke of before (who's bf is also gone now) has already gotten us quite a few free beer tickets. We may need a DD. Or, we'll just have Cheap Trick's limo take us back home.
Saawhheeeeeeeeeeeeettttt!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Had dinner with the mom & pops Sunday eve. They were very well behaved. Well...until my dad got drunk on red wine and my mom started talking politics.
That's always my cue to leave.
But I did take out my tounge ring "for them" at the dinner table. My mom was grossed completely out. But she was astonished. (For those of you who don't read my journal regularly...the dentist told me my gums were receeding b/f of the bar, so I had to take it out...but my parents don't know that...so I pretended it was in 'thanks' for buying me the car.)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
This weekend is the shitty bachelorette party that I have to go to.
I have to make a 2 layer penis cake for the event. And bring retarded 'bachelorette party drinking games' and stupid 'bride veil with penis's on them'.....grrrrr..r....r.r.r.........
Fucking wedding.
God damn pain in my checkbook.
But...at least I know my car won't break down out in the middle of nowhere on the way!!!!
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
BTW.... edited to say.... i think you are the prettiest girl on this site.. no lie.
[Edited on Jun 09, 2005 7:08PM]