I had a bad momeny last night----a really, really bad moment---bad moments---new work yesterday was heaven. Absolute heaven. It's the most beautiful piece yet, a key with a starry, cosmic swirl around it; for the keyholder-- I would do anything for him, and last night was bad--it was worse than bad, it was hell and pain and confusion---
I hung out with some of his friends---beautiful souls. My cat is so cute, as I type she is laying with her fat stomach laid out on her side--she's old. I remember when I got her--I saved her from a lifetime of hell at a cattery in the fucking pine barrens of new jersey.
I am dying, DYING to see him. Its goingt to happen really, really soon. Maybe tonight, or at least by this time next week. It happened so fast, too, I just was overcome by it all. I don't wear my glasses anymore--sometimes seeing everything in a razor sharp light isn't so great. A little blurriness is strangely comforting--or maybe not so strange--Im watching Signs right now but listening to my discman--DISCMAN, what the fuck. I got a pink Ipod the other day and my sister's friend is hooking it up for me with all of my favorite stuff. I hope he drops it off at my work later on, that would rule. I need it now, more than ever. I also need another tattoo---I think the dude who did the key is my new artist--I need to pick one and stop bouncing around. Its a good place, too, quiet and kind of like a well kept secret.
My super charmed ass needs some more ink. My guy doesn't have any ink but i dont care about shit like that. Hes the hottest--the best--inside. He makes me ME--so why am I not with him right now?
I know Im good. I do only good things. I hate evil. Its what makes the world dirty--I want to systematically erase it all from the planet. Maybe I could. ?
I should wear my puerto rican do rag to work today. I love dressing like a mamasita--with a little flower behind my ear.
And I also need to fucking murder some dumb bitch. Or at least just fuck her up good. You always know one or two people who are just blights on the canvas of humanity--people who have no purpose, no direction, no will, just vessels of bad shit. Vessels of evil. Or just blind stupidity. Filter isnt helping anything, either.
I cant listen to happy shit. It makes me sad. ? Filter is good. Where did they go? How random is it that the singer is the younger brother of the evil cop from Terminator 2? Random? haha. I can feel my dad around right now--ahhh. Im always ok because he's nearby. I have his initials tattooed on my arm. So no one could ever steal him from me again. I wonder about his tour of duty in Vietnam--what he saw, what he did. He saved lives over there and got medals but put them away and never talked about it. He bought me a coat when I was little. A red Bulls jacket. He was sick that day but drove all over to like 5 idfferent malls to find it. Things like that are nice for me now.
My dad was a real person. A real crazy amazing man--things in my life are so weird. All I can do is remember him and I together as my daddy and his little girl and hold that shit very, very close.
At least Im not a crackhead or homeless. I can't believe I put him away for so long. That was horribly retarded of me. He was the coolest guy ever, and he dealt with horrible shit in his youth just like me. Im his twin--the female version of tom--that being said, I can do just about fucking anything. Bah.
I hung out with some of his friends---beautiful souls. My cat is so cute, as I type she is laying with her fat stomach laid out on her side--she's old. I remember when I got her--I saved her from a lifetime of hell at a cattery in the fucking pine barrens of new jersey.
I am dying, DYING to see him. Its goingt to happen really, really soon. Maybe tonight, or at least by this time next week. It happened so fast, too, I just was overcome by it all. I don't wear my glasses anymore--sometimes seeing everything in a razor sharp light isn't so great. A little blurriness is strangely comforting--or maybe not so strange--Im watching Signs right now but listening to my discman--DISCMAN, what the fuck. I got a pink Ipod the other day and my sister's friend is hooking it up for me with all of my favorite stuff. I hope he drops it off at my work later on, that would rule. I need it now, more than ever. I also need another tattoo---I think the dude who did the key is my new artist--I need to pick one and stop bouncing around. Its a good place, too, quiet and kind of like a well kept secret.
My super charmed ass needs some more ink. My guy doesn't have any ink but i dont care about shit like that. Hes the hottest--the best--inside. He makes me ME--so why am I not with him right now?
I know Im good. I do only good things. I hate evil. Its what makes the world dirty--I want to systematically erase it all from the planet. Maybe I could. ?
I should wear my puerto rican do rag to work today. I love dressing like a mamasita--with a little flower behind my ear.
And I also need to fucking murder some dumb bitch. Or at least just fuck her up good. You always know one or two people who are just blights on the canvas of humanity--people who have no purpose, no direction, no will, just vessels of bad shit. Vessels of evil. Or just blind stupidity. Filter isnt helping anything, either.
I cant listen to happy shit. It makes me sad. ? Filter is good. Where did they go? How random is it that the singer is the younger brother of the evil cop from Terminator 2? Random? haha. I can feel my dad around right now--ahhh. Im always ok because he's nearby. I have his initials tattooed on my arm. So no one could ever steal him from me again. I wonder about his tour of duty in Vietnam--what he saw, what he did. He saved lives over there and got medals but put them away and never talked about it. He bought me a coat when I was little. A red Bulls jacket. He was sick that day but drove all over to like 5 idfferent malls to find it. Things like that are nice for me now.
My dad was a real person. A real crazy amazing man--things in my life are so weird. All I can do is remember him and I together as my daddy and his little girl and hold that shit very, very close.
At least Im not a crackhead or homeless. I can't believe I put him away for so long. That was horribly retarded of me. He was the coolest guy ever, and he dealt with horrible shit in his youth just like me. Im his twin--the female version of tom--that being said, I can do just about fucking anything. Bah.