Oh honey....I'm so sorry. I wish I could tell you something that would make your pain lessen, but all I can say is I'm thinking of you and your family.
I nearly lost my father in a very quick fashion and have had friends thast lost theirs. It is never easy and there is no way to make it go smoothly because it shouldn't. You have a right to loose it and to flip out. It is a fucked up situation that you have no control over. I reccomend crying and screaming with a primal rage. I know I would.
Anyway, my prayers go out to you and yours. cling to your friends in these times.
if you need anything call